I truly despair at the fake news being published at The Rectum. The facts are a foreign country to Keith Jackson. His award-winning reportage now reaches an audience that is less than half of what it was when he informed us that The Bellshill Bounder was a self-made billionaire with wealth off the radar.
Let’s look at the facts and the known ‘knowns’ :-
1. Dave King is a glib and shameless liar who should not be believed on any matter unless it is supported by objective evidence.
2. Ashley sold his shares to a Teutonic Big Cheese and Club Tropicana.
3. There has been no investment in the club save another £1.5m emergency loan in June. This may be converted into equity at a later date.
4. The rogue board have been engaging in a buy/boycott Hokey Cokey with merchandise and have been left with egg on their faces and no new kit launch for season 2017/2018.
5. The laughing stock clearance sale will barely cover the Puma advance and Sports Direct’s uplift. Net Profits will be negligible.
6. The £5m forecast from retail sales for Rangers Lite is a fantasy.
7. There are no investors lined up to buy a toxic stock with no listing.
8. As Ashley no doubt noted, if all soft loans are converted into equity all the current holdings will be diluted.
9. Caixinha’s Gypsey King journeymen are inordinately unlikely to challenge Celtic this season. Seven-in-a-row is a shoe-in.
10. The sale of the laughing stock is King’s Ratner moment.
11. The Takeover Panel will petition the Court of Session. When King inevitably shows his contempt of court, the next petition will be to ban him as a director of any UK plc. A warrant will be issued for his arrest.
12. No investors will look at a company in which the chairman is subject to a Cold Shoulder. Mike Ashley extricated himself before the ice age bites at Rangers Lite.
13. Halliday, O’Halloran and Mackay were sent home from training on Thursday. They were told in no uncertain terms to find clubs or be confined to training with the youth academy. The austerity is oppressive at Auchenhowie.
Keith Jackson’s reportage is a confection of lies, fantasy and wishful thinking. A soft loan in June, with the majority of the players on 48 week contracts which do not include holiday pay, is a crisis. However you won’t read about this at The Rectum as they attempt to elevate their sales from their 16.4% year on year slump.
Jackson receives awards for his mendacious puff pieces, which tells one all one needs to know about the Scottish Fourth Estate which is in the toilet.