Lite Relief

When watching Rangers Lite make their UEFA debut against Progres Niderkorn, I had the uneasy feeling that Charles Green’s basket of assets would struggle against a good juniors outfit. One could go further and suggest that Caixinha’s motley crew of second tier journeymen, his Gypsey Kings, would struggle against Port Glasgow Juniors FC at Parklea. Having played against them in my callow youth I have nothing but praise for The Undertakers who current ply their trade in the second division of The West of Scotland League Central Division. I would back Port Juniors against Progres on any given Sunday.

It was a lacklustre performance by a team that appears to have thrown the baby out with the bath water. Barrie Mackay, who has been told to find a new club, could not make head nor tail of Caixinha’s tactics at the tail end of the season. Word has it that he was one of many incumbent pros who thought Pedro had lost the plot. One would like to believe that rumours of a senior pro uprising, a coup D’Etat if you will, did not besmirch the ears of directors. There is more Harmony in the serial adulterer’s dating platform than in the dressing room. One might go as far as to suggest that Pedro’s tactics are lost in translation. Rangers Lite’s Holding Group Chairman won’t take this lying down:

Ladina King looking resplendent in her Union Jack frock.


The career criminal could not help himself. He had to come on to the park to milk the applause for his part in guiding Lite to their first ever UEFA competition. Their coefficient did not lie. Continuation is for the birds, bookies and broadcasters, not necessarily in that order.

King urged the fans to live up to the reputation of Rangers. Was he referring to the bad losers, followers of the former club,  who engaged in full scale riots in Barcelona and Manchester, with minor skirmishes in every European Capital? Or was it the anti-Catholic sentiments expressed in the medium of song at The Sectarian Speakeasy? One can but hope that Lite make easier work of the second leg. If the highly improbable occurred the mother of all riots would ensue as the Lite supporters upheld the traditions of the former club.

The UEFA misadventures of Salary McCoist is causing some concern at Hampden. Stewart – Liar Liar Your Crystallised Arse is on Fire – Regan, having been caught out in a lie by evidence presented at the Craig Whyte trial, is rumoured to be looking for a scapegoat. Is he preparing to throw Ali Russel and Andrew Dickson under a bus? Will Regan revert to Sir Bribe & Lie’s mantra by asserting that he was duped?

Which leads to some delicious irony. If the SFA believe that Rangers continue, surely he will engage in disciplinary proceedings against the club? A cynic might suggest that Continuation might melt away like snow on a dyke in Spring.

Word reaches me that a CQN podcast featuring SFA Chairman Alan McRae is in the offing. It should be revealing.







36 thoughts on “Lite Relief”

  1. Donation sent via PayPal F&F. If the Supreme Court throw out deed co’s appeal on Wednesday I believe as Sir Billy Connolly would say “better heat up the Calvary” as the lynch mob may be mobilised

    JJ: Thank you.

  2. JJ Surely a typo? 2nd leg not in Gibralter, Progres’s Stade Jos Haupert is not suitable to host the game so the match has been switched to Luxembourg’s national stadium, Stade Josy Barthel.

    Stay safe.

  3. JJ why do they have UEFA co-efficient points, l don’t understand? ps think the 2nd leg is in Luxembourg 🇱🇺

    1. Every club has a co-efficient, even if they have never being in the competition before. Roughly Clubs coefficients are determined by the sum of all points won in the previous five years. Plus 20% of the association coefficient over the same period, to which that club belongs to.
      Accordingly any club having never competed before are give 20% of the association coefficient over the five year period.
      To which any Scottish club having never competed is 3.785. Charles Green’s Basket of Assets is also 3.785.

  4. Anybody would think that after all his media interviews and appearances on the pitch Dave King was chairman of the football club – not the holding company. A cynic may be of the opinion that the corporate structure at Ibrox is just a deliberate muddying of the water which will prove useful in the next Administration Event.

    Monthly donation PayPal 1082 8982 8993 5989.

    Continue the good work

    JJ: Cheers.

  5. No more bleating, no flimsy excuses, no more I have paid £x amount. Cough up minimum of a fiver or bugger off.

    1. Aye ready to cough up phlegm (emphysema) or coins (party trick). The new waterproof fiver (resplendent mackerel!) represents an interesting third option.

  6. I do hope TRFC make it even easier in the second leg.To suggest the peepul are better going through because they might cause trouble suggests bullys should prevail.Talking of bullys,any reasonable people,please avoid Glasgow City Centre today because of the “parade” that takes place thus causing mayhem and traffic gridlock.Always wonder what tourists think about this ” spectacle”…. ….

    1. Bullies,times two JJ.My excuse is sheer exhaustion,not the schooling.Stay safe and hopefully loaded with cash.

  7. A big congratulations goes to Kenny Miller for scoring Rangers Lite’s first ever goal in European competition.

    How much money do Lite expect to make IF they make the group stages of the Europa League and what will be the collatoral damage should they subsequently fail to do so? Im assuming that theyve stupidly earmarked the dough or even spent it already despite the fact that only 5 clubs have actually qualified for the group stages when starting in the 1st round of qualification.

    The latter is a near certainty anyway as Limassol will be too strong over two legs.

    1. €215,000 1st qualifying round
      €225,000 2nd qualifying round
      €220,000 3rd and €235,000 for play-off losing teams
      Group Stage earns €2.6 million, plus €360k for every win, €120 for every loss.
      That is if they get that far.

      Even if Lite make the group stage, I highly doubt it will get them into the black. What would be funny is if UEFA decide to withhold the prize money for Lite failing the FFP till they can get their books in order.

      1. Thanks for that reply tweak.
        I really can’t see them getting past the Cypriots in the 2nd round but I’m concerned that they won’t be called out by UEFA on fair play. They somehow always seem to “get away with it”. The Europa league money really does pale into insignificance when compared to CL revenues.

  8. Rob O’Keefe

    Did nobody tell you that things such as painting kerbs RW&B, drunken parents parading Lite tops, young (and impressionable) wanes and bottles of Buckie, not to mention marching through our streets and bringing our city to a standistill, is merely a celebration of culture? It’s their birthright. I live in one of the cultural heartlands and it’s paradoxically depressing and educational to watch.

    1. JP,I have,unfortunately,grown up surrounded by this blight on society.I used to get annoyed but like Sir W.Connolly decided to do,I laugh at them and almost,but don’t pity them because as you state,they pass on this “culture” to the young and impressionable.Thankfully,their numbers are dwindling,like msm sales,year on year.Good news though for July:TRFC to be disciplined next Friday for objects being thrown on to the pitch,probably in rapture at the result.

      1. Hello Rob. Having lived in Larkhall for 10 years I have seen this lot in all of their glory. Rather than intimidate me it makes me a bit angry: Angry when I see young kids in attendance, angry when I see the mess that is left behind (at the taxpayers expense) and angry when I see the followers kitted out in their sevco tops. Anger and pity. It’s their way of showing us kaffliks who the boss is but, in reality, it’s all that they have to cling onto such is the rapid pace of decline that they are witnessing in all matters football.
        Here’s hoping for good news this week. It would make my flight to Croatia all the more enjoyable.

  9. A reminder to all,

    Rangers have already admitted guilt in at least 5 EBT cases, their liquidators are appealing all the others. Have we got that? Already admitted guilt in both the big tax case and the DOS were tax case.

    Guilty as charged, guilty as admitted. The appeal is a smokescreen.

    JJ a couple of donations recently, I hope they find you well

    JJ: Gratefully received.

  10. Aye the July EBT finality finally finally arrives.

    It’s been a long time coming. But due process has not dampened the passion for justice nor anger at the crime.

    There was a massive Sporting Advantage and that’s why David Murray and Rangers did it. To get an advantage over other honest clubs to win the SPL, to gain entry to win the champions league.

    Celtic FC must lodge a claim of five SPL prize monies plus Champions League lost revenue against Oldco RFC.

    In addition five Celtic teams deserve their honestly won gold medals, other teams deserve their silvers and bronzes.

    How can this new Rangers hold the titles a former Liquidated Rangers won? Including the corruptly cheated titles?

    Roll on Wednesday, roll on the finality.

    If David Murray is guilty of corporate tax crimes then his Knighthood for services to business is untenable. Unlawful Services to himself rings truer. I expect Nicola Sturgeon to be first in line calling for the Knighthood to be stripped.

    1. Is it come Wednesday that we discover that the First Minister of Scotland has sat and dined with a near to billion pound crashed company man and tax avoider?

      We shall see.

      If so, I’m sure the numerous victims over the years shall be queueing with their dirks to stab him in the front.

      It would make for a good Robert Louis Stevenson story.

  11. Well it’s that time of year again jj, they’ve washed their purple and Orange sashes, dusted down their big drums, polished their shoes and been for a number 1 haircut. yes it’s marching season again . takes me back to the 60s and 70s growing up in glasgow when there must have been at least 100,000 of them following their favourite bands around the streets and eventually meeting in glasgow green for a bevvy and a fight with any poor fenians they could get their hands on..I’m from a wee village in the east end of glasgow that they used to March through. but they would conveniently stop outside the chapel and Celtic pub giving the sash and the Billy boys laldie with not one iota from the cops.
    The owner of the Celtic pub was smart enough to lock the doors before they came bye ’cause he knew that we would try and get out to get intae them when they stopped to play their upto their knees in fenian blood tunes outside our Celtic shop..remember we were young and full of resentment back then..they hated us then and they still do.
    it really was hard being a Catholic and growing up back when Scotland was run not by protestants but by anti Catholics, my mother God rest her soul, my aunts, cousins, uncles, best friends and the woman I’ve been married to for almost 40 years are all protestant but not one of them are anti Catholic..I detest those Orange anti Catholic peepul more than anything..but I certainly don’t hate protestants…I hope it pisses from the heavens today and they all get drowned in their own poisoned Orange blood.
    I’m away to watch just another Saturday starring Billy Connelly and Jon Morrison , written by the brilliant Peter McDougall. it’s a realistic portrayal of the Orange walk in Glasgow from the 70s. It’s well worth watching if you’ve not seen it jj..HH

    1. Nerdy detail. It was mainly filmed in the South side of Edinburgh in Street behind the present day St Leonard’s Police Station near to the Jeannie Deans pub and also in Leith near Newhaven and Trafalgar Street off Ferry Road. Not sure if any of it was filmed in Glasgow.

  12. It would be interesting to find out the Hearts chairperson thoughts on the Europa debate. She’s always up front and ready when commenting on the traveling Celtic support. Now it seems she has lost her tongue when a flagrant breach of the Ffp rules has cost her club a place at the European table. John any thoughts on this ?

  13. The new/auld taps will be out in full swing today. I will be watching from my bhoy’s place in the toon, such a colourful event. Wee chapel at the end of the road seems to get the best of the tradition.

  14. Naismith having to appease the sevco as Kenny MacSevco grills him into submission. No mention of the fact he took the EBT. Naismith is a shitbag he knows what he left for, he knew the comments were the truth thats why he left. The Union advised him this is not the incorporated company you signed for this is a new co and club, the incorporated and your contract is gone you are free to under employment law TUPE, if it is the same club and company you do not have this choice you are contracted, forget the shit Naismith you left under employment law which cover administration and liquidation and changes the contract, your choice stay for newco or go, you went no big deal mate others left also for the money in a new contract and career..

  15. JJ, smaller than normal donation made this month. Apols but its what I can afford right now.
    We await the week ahead with baited breath !!

    JJ: No need to apologise. If everyone was as conscientious as you are I would not be troubled by the ebb and ebb of contributions.

  16. The potential ramifications of the Supreme Court ruling this week are truly immense. I expect a media concerted campaign to ignore the findings and seek to perpetuate the continuation myth. They know that this is the final hurdle and if they can clear it then the myth will endure. Harsh words on on blogs will not suffice. This will be the time for decisive actions by people with power to uphold sporting integrity. Title stripping from Oldco does not affect Sevco. The gypsy kings will still compete till the money runs out

    1. I am going to gradually reintroduce them. It was always my intention to tidy up the archive and ensure that the body of work stands up in the longer term, and is not just a snapshot of a point in time. I reposted ‘Stay Classy’ without any fanfare. This trend will continue.

  17. I see brother Pedro has stopped the messing around at Ibrox….. There will be no more 5:1 pumpings now that he has banned his players from wearing green boots and installed “We are the people” murals……..

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