Tinpot Titles

Prior to the issue of yet another ridiculous statement by the rogue board, the title of this piece was ‘A tale of two Macs.’  I tipped Hibs to be runners-up to Celtic this season. Their performance at Celtic Park did nothing to disabuse me of this notion despite Aberdeen drawing level with Celtic at the top of the table.

McGinn and McGregor scored a brace each with their left feet. McGinn’s 25 yard volley which resulted in his second goal was a good height for Gordon and should not have found the net. Not that too much criticism should be levelled at Gordon. His agility in diverting the ball from under a Hibs forward’s feet prevented a third goal by the visitors.

I anticipated a flat performance by Celtic after Wednesday evening’s CL exploits. The players would have returned to Glasgow in the wee small hours of Thursday morning and would have gone home to sleep, giving Brendan Rodgers only one day to work with them prior to the Hibs clash.

Willie Collum’s performance was erratic to say the least. Sinclair was being dragged back in the box. Collum put his whistle in his mouth to blow for a penalty, but changed his mind when Sinclair’s poor attempt at goal was easily blocked and saved. Collum could argue that he played the advantage.

Honours even was a fair result.

Back at Fawlty Towers on Edmiston Drive it was statement o’clock. The latest communiqué was a doozy:

RANGERS’ Eusebio Cup match against Benfica, scheduled for Friday October 6, has been cancelled.

Benfica, who lost 5-0 away to FC Basel in the Champions League last midweek, have pulled out and Rangers are still waiting for an explanation.

Rangers were due to fly out to Canada for the match – scheduled for Tim Hortons Field in Hamilton – on Tuesday 3 October but were informed of Benfica’s decision only hours ago.

The organisers, Elite Soccer Entertainment, have apologised but Rangers will be expressing their displeasure on behalf of themselves and their supporters in the strongest possible terms.

Rangers also wish to apologise to those fans, who had made arrangements to travel, and those in Canada, who were looking forward to the match.

Rangers will take legal advice before commenting further.”

Having dodged a bullet when avoiding a trip they can ill afford, Stewart Robertson gets mauled by a lion which has escaped from the Murray Park Zoo.

The chances are that Stephen Kerr or Slim Shady Traynor penned this ode to joy. Joy for those laughing their heads off at the inclusion of a CL result which has nothing whatsoever to do with Benfica’s decision to withdraw. Benfica cited pricing and poor advance box office. Perhaps Benfica should counter with a vague reference to Lite’s humiliating exit at the hands of FC Progrès Niederkorn. There are times at Murray Park when I suspect the human variant of mad cow disease – Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease – has broken out. Or is Slim Shady’s gout playing up again?

Rangers Lite will have to make do with The Florida Cup in January which is a pre-season tournament. If Pena can stay sober long enough he might win a gold-plated Mickey Mouse for being player of the tournament.

What an accolade. The Eusebio/Florida Cup double is now off for the most mendacious team in world football. Both cups would have taken pride of place in the broom cupboard which doubles as a trophy room.




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27 thoughts on “Tinpot Titles”

  1. Hibs were the first Scottish team to play attacking football at Celtic Park. Celtic are renowned for dropping points after a CL match. All in all a fair result despite yet another a crap refereeing display by Collum. Hibs will probably be second or third. Rangers Lite are still trading whilst insolvent. When will the SFA or Police Scotland step in?

  2. JJ, the whole event seemed strange. Was Mendes the link with Benfica and the organisers?
    Is there a huge Portuguese community in the area to support the event?
    Benfica have 9 first teamers away on international duty.
    What sort of crowd would Benfica reserves v the 3rd best team in the SPFL draw?
    Someone has sold the promoters a pig in a poke with no prospect of covering both teams expenses, never mind the usual appearance fees.
    The promotors would have lost a fortune.
    There’s something fishy about the whole event.

    1. Sevco probably persuaded everyone that Ontario is full of blue noses Scots emigres.

      Nobody bought tickets.

      Nobody in Canada really interested in watching Sevco.

    2. Spot on, try and find any publicity about this match – zilch, try and find Elite Soccer Entertainments – I couldn’t. Something is rotten in the state of Denmark!

    3. Are you suggesting that sevco/rangers do not have any players in the Scotland squad.
      Oh thats right its Portugese players they have and none of them can play for Scotland god you could be right.

  3. That’s not a broom cupboard it’s a bike shed, keep up JJ, I bet they wish they still had those shares in Arsenal , they could have used them as collateral for a bank loan perhaps. Silly me.

  4. Newspapers will always protect their rats and snitches by declaring them not rats and snitches.

    Because it was that newspaper snitched to.

    Elaborate cover up stories get fed to the Gullible for consumption.

    The newspaper needs future snitches to feel safe and what if a galactic strategist advised the player to snitch in the first place? Oh dear! Dirty tricks Plan against the manager backfired.

    Pedro 1 Jabba 0.

    1. Keech attacking the disfunctional mess that is the Sevco outsourced media outfit.

      Oh dear! Wonder who that is?

      Looks like the Daily Rancid editor is having a pop at Jabba for the Miller mess and not taking the blame.

    1. Yes, I decided to cut to the real bone of the matter. Lite fancied themselves to beat an under strength Benfica. They could have then engaged in the hubris, bombast and triumphalism that their supporters sorely miss.

  5. Yesterday Sportscene replayed the James Forrest incidents several times. With zoom in.

    It was agreed by all in studio the first tackle caught him on the left ankle. It was a foul and not a dive. Wrongful yellow. I would expect an appeal on the playback evidence.

    1. It would take some nerve to appeal that given that Forrest was looking for it and then dived again later without any contact. He should have been issued with a second yellow card and a red (having by now been booked). I can only imagine his previous good character saved him in Collum’s eyes, either that or the ref just bottled it. James needs to have a word with himself. I don’t like to see Celtic players going to ground unless they’ve been fouled.

      I would also like to add that on the Sinclair penalty that never was, Sinclair paid the price for not hitting the deck as soon as he was tugged. Had that been Neymar he would have left the field in an oxygen tent. Collum saw the foul and was ready to blow but Sinclair chose to stay on his feet and fashion an effort on goal. Collum allowed the advantage. Once the chance was gone there was no going back. This isn’t Rugby Union. Poor decision making by Scott Sinclair (not Wullie Collum) cost him a penalty kick, but given that Celtic should have had ten men by this point it was a deserved break for Hibs.

  6. Donation made JJ…your site is my first port of call every morning…stay safe and keep outing the crooks

    JJ: Thank you.

  7. JJ, I suspect full-blown mad cow disease has broken out at Murray Park.
    Neither Creutzfeldt nor Jakob would be, erm, considered good enough to get a run out with the youths.

  8. Kenny is the fall guy in the snitchgate scandal.

    He needs to come out and tell the fans the truth. Is he stitched up while the culprit(s) telling him to do it are still sitting pretty?

    Was he advised by a senior Ibrox figure to rat on Pedro to the record? Did he believe he was acting on club instructions for the better of the club?

    If so, Kenny needs to name who got him into this mess.

  9. I can attest there was zero news here in Toronto on this event-can’t speak for Hamilton though.
    There is a very large number of Portuguese immigrants in this area.A large community in Toronto and a sizeable one in Kitchener and Cambridge – two towns west of
    Benfica enjoys huge support in the diaspora,
    Don’t know for sure but think Benficsa was the dominant side when the first gen immigrants arrived.
    Benfica has a supporters club a mere two blocks from where I live and certainly 4 of my near neighbours are Benficista.
    Widely promoted and at the right ticket price , I expect the stadium could be filled with Benfica support.
    Rangers wont resonate now- we are are multicultural society now.


  10. There is a huge Portuguese community in Toronto — massive! It’s just that they had no interest in watching Benfica’s Under-20s playing a five-year-old club from a European league they’ve never won and never will, despite all the lies and the bombast.

    And I believe Benfica have quoted a former club called Rangers being described as the 16th most corrupt club in Europe. They’re obviously irked about the arbitrary and snide mention of their 0-5 CL result in Sevco’s statement.

    The banter years are over, I’m informed! Lol!

  11. The trading while insolvent angle need a bit more to it. It’s not an easy task to define but basically falls into either a failure to meet debts when they become due or when liabilities exceed assets.

    A key “debt” is meeting the payroll. Clearly September has passed but October could be much tougher. As for any of the loans expiring and not rolled over would be fatal.

    The assets are still officially significant though how the value of Ibrox suddenly rocketed from £2MM or so to over £40MM was nothing short of a miracle. However officially that’s the value in the accounts so the liabilities are lower.

    Given that the directors in the last accounts basically promised to keep the lights on it’s only when they really truly run out of cash can they be said to be trading insolvently.

    So watch this space.

    The threats against you are quite staggering for simply stating uncomfortable truths. Try and keep it up.

    1. Excuse the ignorance but surely at some juncture the asset values need to be audited/validated? Who determines what they are to the extent that it may facilitate fraudulent trading (as is likely here)?
      Don’t get me wrong, we appear to be rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic but I’m just curious

    2. Is Paul Murray, A chartered accountant, doing his job as a director of RIFC plc dutifully and delivering legal requirements?

      Is he continually looking at twelve months rolling forecast calculating solvency and solvent trading? Does he demonstrate this to the SFA?

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