Desperate Times at Rangers Lite

Despite being in and out of Europe in three hours, with Progres being somewhat limited by the fourth best team in Luxembourg, it would seem that the lite fans brought home a souvenir. A vile chant that was spawned in the leafy squares of Niederkorn is now doing the rounds in Scottish football grounds.

In a new addition to the incessant sectarian soundtrack comes the following:

The Lisbon Lions won’t see ten in a row.”

As Celtic fans rightly venerate the fiftieth anniversary of an achievement that was unprecedented in Northern Europe at that time, and has never been matched by any Scottish club, the knuckle draggers seem to be eating sour plums again. However their response to criticism about this vile chant took my breath away:

It’s only a song. What about your songs about the Ibrox disaster?”

I have never been a regular at Celtic Park but I have seen highlights from the majority of their matches. In a timeline that spans a couple of decades, I have never heard a chant of this nature. An exercise in faux whataboutery is a sorry excuse for the inexcusable.

BBC Scotland, who took umbrage when one of their reporters was banned from Ibrox for a report on the vile chants from the lowest common denominator of Scottish football supporters, known by the collective noun as ‘Scotland’s Shame‘, have now been browbeaten into silence.

Or are the BBC just incompetent? BBC Scotland have a dedicated page on Dundee United yet they have not picked up on my exclusive that Stephen Thompson and his board have sold out to U.S. interests. Did the clocks go back at BBC Scotland or have they stopped? For The Klan in the photograph – including the delightfully named Livingston Combat Company – the clocks stopped in 1690.

As we fast forward to the present day giving The Klan a nosebleed, it would seem that there is some elation in the ranks apropos Murty’s charges beating the spent force that is Hearts FC. One comedian on our comments board suggested that Murty would be manager of the month in November. I guess if those who decide ‘swing the lead‘ this may not be as fanciful as it seems.

With the exception of Keith Jackson, who is always good for a laugh as we start the working week, I rarely read anything from Trinity Mirror’s beleaguered Scottish titles. As I was perusing The Clumpany’s satire, I came across a piece by Michael Gannon that compared Rangers Lite to a 72 ounce steak.

Had he suggested that Lite were a large Cow Pie that only Desperate Dan could get his teeth into, his metaphor might have had some traction.

Of course Gannon stopped short as his title is being boycotted by the Lisbon Lions Recidivists Choir. Despite the mixed metaphors Gannon may be on to something when he asserted that the botched appointment of Caixinha had set back Lite by a year.

When Primark Pedro inherited Warburton’s squad, he sat in the stands as Lite earned an unlikely draw when Bobby Madden looked the other way as Leigh Griffiths was felled by a waist-high tackle from behind just as he was about to net Celtic’s winner. It was a penalty and red card all day long, but not on Madden’s watch.


Madden even had the audacity to ask Griffiths if it was a penalty. Madden is a blatant cheat who should play no part in any game involving Celtic or Rangers Lite. He wears his support for the latter on his sleeve.

The Lite supporters partied like it was a tax-evading 1999. Murty had put a smile on their faces. However Lite were still 24 points behind Celtic. After Pedro took charge they finished 39 points adrift and suffered the ignominy of a 5-1 reverse at Ibrox, which is referred to colloquially in Glasgow as ‘a total humping.’

Caixinha should have been sacked on the spot, but with the Progres game only a matter of weeks away he was spared. No-one could ever accuse the Lite board of not having a sense of humour. Primark Pedro was comedy gold. He was Mr. Bean in a light blue tracksuit.

Debate is raging on other forums about Jim Delahunt’s statement that McInnes will be unveiled as the Lite manager on Wednesday. Has he been tipped off by the Aberdeen manager’s agent, or is he flying a kite supplied by Level 5? His credibility – is that too strong a word for Delahunt where the ‘h’ in his surname is regularly replaced by a ‘c’ – will be shot to pieces should McInnes not emerge from the Blue Room with a face painted like a Cheshire Cat.

If this were to occur and Stewart Milne accepted compensation on the ‘never never’ the Aberdeen fans would be quick to pick up their pitchforks. Milne is an SFA lickspittle. If he was a lickspittle to the SFA’s eleven, he would be as popular as Salman Rushdie in a Tehran mosque.

I suspect the unseen gout-riddled hands of Slim Shady Traynor are behind this. The Ibrox board don’t have the £1.5m it would take to buy McInnes out of his new contract. However they would like us to believe that this quantum is within their gift.

Murty is the obvious choice. He has the confidence of the ‘Whatsapp’ crew, notably Wallace and Miller, and will stand idly by as the Qatari owned players head south. Their tenure at Ibrox was always going to be temporary. Pedro Mendes has a plan.


30 thoughts on “Desperate Times at Rangers Lite”

  1. Confirmation number: 2B836821V34429xxxx

    Dear JJ,

    We await with bated breath to see what twists and turns will develop this week in the world of Scottish football. While the green and white end of the city welcome giants Bayern Munich for a tie which will have the media salivating, their poor neighbours in the West of the city will no doubt fill some column inches of their own when long awaited 2016-17 accounts are finally published and we get to hear who might emerge as the latest fall guy to head up the “caravan”.
    McInnes would seem to be the choice of many and he’s already effectively taken the Queens shilling during his playing career to join the then RFC (IL). At the time I’m sure all Ton fans understood why he choose to leave us at the Tail O’ the Bank to head up the river to Govan. This time round the decision, if he chooses to take it, is far from as clear cut. He’s not joining the same group and the probability that he might undo all the hard work he has put in to establish considerable managerial credibility is high.

    Keep up the great work. I’m sure you will be spoilt for choice on which topics to cover over the next few weeks.

    JJ: Thanks West Coaster. McInnes would be inordinately foolish to sup from this poisoned chalice. It would kill his promising career stone dead.

  2. JJ, getting trouble since the weekend trying to pay. Are there problems at your end ?

    JJ: It has been quiet but recurring donations went through. I have no control over PayPal.

  3. What idiot would take on a job when you can be dismissed without any payoff and it be deemed a resignation? What idiot would take on a job where the company does not have enough funds to be in existence at Christmas.

  4. On the topic of the hapless performance of Pedro, it has been nagging away at me for the past week as to who his slapstick tenure reminded me of.
    He was in fact Scottish football’s own answer to Christian Gross, who endured a similar crash and burn roller coaster reign at Tottenham two decades ago.

    Exotic sounding manager with success in a mediocre background? CHECK. (Swiss title winners)
    Windbag fanciful metaphors? CHECK (“this tube ticket is my ticket to dreams”)
    Embarrassing home gubbing? CHECK (a 1–6 home defeat to Chelsea)

    Add in the exotic foreign duds, and a training ground revolt at his methods, and you realise the Ibrox outfit have regressed not one season in hiring Pedro, but by a metaphorical 20!

  5. Whit like mon?

    If Delahunt is stating he will be revealed as Sevco manager then that states 2 things:
    1. McInnes is a public liar (he stated no approach has been made and no discussion taken place).
    2. Milne is a weak cave in piece of sh*t.

    If Delahunt is right then an approach has been made, negotiated and accepted.

    Or is Delahunt the Liar for Jabba? The media as usual trying to force a positive for Sevco? Trying to force McInnes’ hand?

    In my view McInnes would be a strong candidate for the Celtic job in two seasons when Rodgers wins 10 IAR and moves on. He would be the strongest Scottish candidate.

    Celtic recently gave McInnes a footballing lesson in excellence at Pitodrie. The media went easy on him preferring to focus on the CFC masterclass.

    Does he think he could beat this CFC squad with TRFC hopefuls? And a menacing media on his back for every defeat?

    Or would he prefer to throw his hat in the ring and manage the CFC squad in a few years?

    I don’t think McInnes is anywhere near as good as Rodgers. He has picked up second place on a non competing Sevco shambles. I think the complexity of the Sevco mess would result in poor football results regardless of any manager’s efforts.

    Wrecking Aberdeen is more the Sevco aim to take second spot than trying to beat Aberdeen fairly and leaving Aberdeen and it’s manager and players alone.

  6. If McInness takes the Sevco Job then we’re being spun a lot of Shite from every Blogger who cares to print it..McInness is nobody’s full..He knocked back the Sunderland job because of the state the club was in when he checked under the bonnet..If he takes the Sevco job then we’re being spun a lot of Guff..Somebody’s Lying To us Here and the question will be answered Shortly

  7. After 11 games this season Celtic are 4 pts worse off than same stage last season….. Rangers show an improvement of 2 points…
    Meanwhile Aberdeen show an improvement of 8 pts!
    Would McInnes be wise to stay put?
    Whilst in Europe… And that may well continue into 2018…. Celtic could end up drawing more games than last year…. Could McInnes capitalise on this more at Aberdeen?

  8. “Rangers move for Derek McInnes will not be rushed as club prepare list of managerial candidates”

    Lol. Lol. Lol.

    So it’s another mind f*ck on Gullibillies. Media says McInnes a done deal. Media says list of hopefuls with costs being cobbled together for board consideration. Lol.

    What a Jabba befuddled media circus it is.

    1. Do you contribute to our site? If you do, provide your reference number. If you don’t I’ll put it in industrial language that will make my position clear. I’m not here to pander to you. Got it?

  9. I’m strangely torn on this one.

    All logic suggests it won’t and shouldn’t happen but McInnes’ interview and body language seemed to suggest that it was possible 🤔

    Unless of course he was posturing for a wage rise

  10. Does Delahunt have two independent sources for his exclusive?

    Hasn’t he got previous for spouting Sevco pish, being proven categorically wrong and keeping his job?

  11. Meanwhile Stateside – sealed indictments released on a dodgy ex-campaign official who with held disclosures, failed to register properly and engaged in some concealed money shenanigans

    This fella is not free as I write, surrendered to the FBI less than 2 hours ago

    The mighty Glasgow Rangers (& Lite) have practiced this obfuscation for 15 years – has anyone ever been held accountable?


    I don’t have a lot of confidence anything will change in the next 15 years except maybe Rangers III & Rangers IV after a couple more financial suicides

  12. Say goodbye to Brother Pedro
    As he sings the Celtic Song
    How it breaks our hearts to lose him
    Now the caravan is gone
    At Ibrox the Huns are raging
    That he led them down the drain
    But the carnival is over
    We won’t see his like again.

    There were tears and there was laughter
    As he tried to win three games
    Always ending in disaster
    And him sounding more deranged
    Now the dole queue line is calling
    This must be our last goodbye
    For the carnival is over
    Thanks for helping Sevco die.

    1. R.St., haven’t seen you posting for a while, and that’s a real shame. I can’t remember what I really liked of yours previously, but I remember the moniker. I know, like this, it was real quality. You’re a talent and hopefully will be encouraged to display that talent more often.
      Have you not been posting ’cause you’re ‘seeking’ something ‘new’ ? (Sorry, crap like that proves I’m no talent but doesn’t prove I can’t spot the genuine article. Keep it up.)

  13. For me there is no doubt that DM will stick with Aberdeen this season, before moving to easy pickings dawn souff.

    Celtic are finding it tough to balance their resources between CL, WC internationals, and – thankfully – an improved and more competitive home programme.

    All that leaves Aberdeen in a nice position – despite last week’s setback – to cement their place as Scotland’ssecond best.
    Who would grudge them a Scottish Cup win this season?

    The problem with Aberdeen is S. Milne, CBE.
    If only he was a 100% Dons man, you could start talking about a “new firm” in Scottish football.

    A propos de nowt , I have just seen that a certain Mr Jack has been selected for the latest Scotland squad (midfielder, it seems).
    Words fail me…

    1. Whether or not Ryan Jack should be in the Scotland squad…. I wonder if there would be such a fuss made if he was still playing for the Dons?

    2. Cant see him moving from Dons unless its to England. Scots football hasnt the fan base (check the size of most stadiums not in Glasgow) or Tv money to be able to finance top talent.

      What Scots club could afford to enter a bidding war for talent on the level of Ronaldo or Messi?

      Granted to attract them youd need in present times guaranteed Champions league competition for exposure and you wd have to pay way over the odds in salary and perqs and even then you wd only get someone at the near end of a career cashing in one last time -its not on.
      You have to spot emerging talent before they become Ronaldo or Messi and then nurture them -at which point they will be moving on.

      Celtics acheivement is outstanding and theyve spent their resources wisely thus far but lets not lose sight that their are no guarantees. Celtic might be a mortal lock to win the SPL but that only gets them to the preliminary rounds as all well know.

      On an unrelated point perhaps JJ and others can enlighten me on the issue of Bigotry as its understood in Scotland.

      Being Irish-Scots descent and RC growing up in Canada I experience the dying thrashes or Orange power here in Ontario. Its long gone now as a political force on the national and provincial level but if you drive around our province pretty much every small town north of here and in southwest Ontario has an orange lodge in it still-whether they are empty as their churches I dont know.

      So Im more used to political-religious bigotry coming from the Orangemen to keep down the RC and I am astonished to hear charges of Bigotry laid agains Celtic fans by the WATP brigade -going back to Charles Green.

      I am not suggesting their are not places where RC people do not behave in a bigoted manner to others nor wd I deny that anyone who holds the position that their religion was the only true religion isnt by definition bigoted -Im only asking in Glasgow of all places how it can be suggested seriously the the Irish-Scots Rc minority cabal can harm these people at all?Surely just an emotional thing not logical?

      At any rate dont get it from here.
      Expecting monthly pension payout later this week JJ-will send you another top up when received.
      Stay safe and be well

  14. Now normal pay day contribution just made 2SM78657HM789****
    What has Ryan Jack done to deserve a call up apart from move to Glasgow?

    JJ: Thank you.

  15. In relation to the Lisbon Lions, one of the first people to greet them on their return to Glasgow was John Lawrence, then chairman of Rangers. Perhaps the animal trash, who career through life in a permanent rage, should take a look at real dignity and proper rivalry and realise that a lesson in class and respect is there for the taking.

  16. I agree DM will be too rich for their blood. Murty will get it and to be fair he comes across very very well.

    On Duff and their compensation for false arrest and damages from Police Scotland you’re being fed a line. Its been settled subject to DCI Jim Robertson and Jim Keegan Advocate Depute being sacked. No court case on 15 Nov. We’ll see who’s info is better 😉

  17. Someone asked on Twitter yesterday what is it that the Sevco fans might sing whereby action would finally be taken – one of the answers was basically “nothing.” And therein lies the problem, there seems to be an abject fear amongst the SMSM in reporting the filth they usually spout, and the authorities in prosecuting it, when it comes to the folk down Ibrox way. Will it ever change? Not for as long as some version of “Rangers” remains in existence.

    Great stuff today again JJ, you’ve really hit your stride lately. One question, is a book still in the offing or have you shelved that plan? Would be a good stocking filler for me from Mrs Spaniard. Cheers, TS

    1. Hi TS. My plans to write a book have been put on the back burner. TM was arranging a publisher but this seems to have fallen over. Releasing it as a digital offering behind a paywall might work but I would have to limit access to only those that I know and trust as one hater has promised to access it and dump it free online. A book will eventually emerge, but it will be inclusive of ‘the cold shoulder’ and the demise of King.

  18. JJ, was in contact with a DUFC Associate Director tail end of last week re the USA story…..they are denying it. Anywhere on the web ala companies house where there is concrete evidence of the transaction ? Cheers .

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