South African Psycho

For those of you not familiar with American Psycho it’s a 2000 American pitch black comedy horror film co-written and directed by Mary Harron, based on Bret Easton Ellis’s 1991 novel of the same name. It includes a number of disturbing vignettes where the film’s lead and narrator Patrick Bateman (Christian Bale) compensates for his sinecure of a day job by acting out/fantasising about the most despicable acts that could be conjured up in Ellis’s twisted imagination. It includes a scene where Bateman, dressed in what can best be described as a makeshift CSI suit, discusses the finer points of a post-Gabriel Genesis prior to setting about his house guest with an axe.

As far as I’m concerned, The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway, which is in many ways a flawed album, brought the curtain down on Genesis. The plastic pop that followed was anathema to me. I continue to this day to be an ardent follower of Gabriel.




The term turpitude, which has the Latin root turpis i.e. disgraceful, base, is more often than not used in conjunction with moral and gross moral. The latter is grounds for dismissal in most public bodies. However when used in a corporate context one can have no doubt that this article will focus on the question as to what happens next at Ibrox.

When Ashley sold his shares to Club 1872 the last impediment to resolution 11 being passed had been removed. Other dissenting voices have had their rights to vote rescinded. The fact that King and his rogue board can get away with this and continue to be regarded as a PLC should stick in the craw of all right thinking men and women.

The problem is that we are not dealing with right thinking individuals. We are dealing with a South African Psycho. King, with a tenner in his pocket, emigrated to a country where live ammunition and water cannons were liberally used to oppress the indigenous majority. The agitators in chief were either murdered (Biko) or incarcerated for life (Mandela). It was a state of flux. The perfect conditions for a career criminal on the make.

As much as I enjoyed our resident forensic accountants debating the finer points of impairment, I could sense that some of my readers were not quite up to the comptroller minutiae. A sidebar developed on the merits of Fergus McCann. There are those who believe he should have risked his money and spent 5 years working selflessly for a noble cause. Playing for the jersey if you will. They baulk at McCann making £40m when he cashed in his chips. They should think again. Celtic have a minimum of a 10,000 seat advantage at the box office over its rivals. This, and lucrative sponsorship deals, have given Celtic the edge to win six successive titles and to participate in the Champions League year after year. They are a business with a turnover north of £90m which outstrips the new club in Govan by a factor of three.

Ask yourself a question. Who would you prefer to have at the helm of your club? Fergus McCann or Dave King? McCann was always truthful and straight. If King bade you good morning you would be well-advised to check your watch. If he shook your hand a quick audit of your fingers would be in order.

The financial results were from the warm-up magicians in the rogue board including the odious Dickson who is cut from the same cloth as King. The ‘rabbit from the hat’ moment will become apparent when the agenda for the AGM of 30 November is published.

There are those who believe that McInnes will dress up in a sequinned tutu a la Debbie McGhee to distract the audience from the real sleight of hand. The Sunday Post, plagiarising copy written by Jackson and originally drafted by Slim Shady Traynor, are confident that McInnes will make the move this week. What’s £800,000 to a company burning millions? Should McInnes join this clusterfuck of a club he will be buying one-way passage on the Titanic minus iceberg insurance. The bears will turn increasingly Polar should he not secure The Scottish Cup. If he did not secure Europa League participation he would be summarily dismissed.

Rumour has it that Bomber Brown kicked Warburton’s arse when he failed to land the Scottish Cup. The lickspittle SMSM would have us believe that the players were safeguarding themselves from green-hued marauders. The prosaic fact is that Warburton was cowering from the board. Gilligan let rip with some blistering invective. They rounded on Warburton like hyenas on a bare week.

Warburton knew that his time was up in the close season. However he had to bide his time until the manager merry-go-round created a vacancy at Nottingham Forest. When he left, Lite were a distant 24 points behind Celtic. McInnes would not have the cushion of a season in the second-tier against part-time teams. He would be up against teams who have the confidence to play at Ibrox and win. He might be dismissed in a matter of months.

The next two games against Hamilton and Dundee have six points written all over them. Matters become more interesting for McInnes on Wednesday 29th, the day before the AGM, when Aberdeen visit Ibrox. Would McInnes wear a tin hat to fend off the invective from the travelling Aberdeen support?  How would he feel about rocking up at Pittodrie with Lite a few days later on Saturday 2nd December? Does he have King’s rhino skin? Is he the South African Psycho’s apprentice?

Auldheid, who is a most welcome contributor on this site, is of the opinion that we have returned to 2011 where the same perpetrators subverted Rangers UEFA licence application. On the face of it being a minimum of £19.9m in debt, excluding the pay-off to Caixinha and his team and the acquisition of Dorrans, drives a coach and horses through FFP. However King unequivocally stated that Lite are FFP compliant which is good enough for the craven SFA.

Why be hung for a lamb when a sheep is available? The hiring of Mcinnes would put Lite in the box seat for the back-to-back games with Aberdeen.

To be FFP compliant RIFC must convert the loan debt into equity, but this flies in the face of another snippet from the report. The loan repayments have been postponed until 2019. Are our ursine friends beginning to realise that a debt for equity swap would be throwing good money after bad?

How many shares would have to be issued to cover the loan debt?  At 27p, just north of 74 million. However there is a major issue to be considered. If the rogue board pulled this off they would be breaching concert party regulations by stealth. At the moment only the South African Psycho’s head is on the concert party block. Do our ursine friends fancy an encounter with Patrick Bateman’s axe?

We are not living in an apartheid-riven state of flux. The City are watching. Its public watchdog, The Takeover Panel, is alive to the South African Psycho. Should Bannatyne pull the trigger, King will be dead in the water.

The Gullibillies are staring into the abyss, but are being distracted by the thought of Derek McInnes in a sequinned tutu.




45 thoughts on “South African Psycho”

  1. Good article, and I agree with you about Gabriel. When he left they became a mediocre chart band. Keep up the good work!

    1. As someone who’s first love outwith the cluster fuck of an omnishambles is Genesis, post and whilst Gabriel, A Trick of the Tail and Wind and Wuthering stand as classics. Having attended their final gig in Rome with over 500,000 others, not all of us could be wrong. Keep Murty I SAY!!

  2. At the risk of being shot down I quite liked Then There Were Three! Phil Collins is a miserable wee shite mind you. Gabriel had Paul Weller on guitar on, I think, his first solo album so always liked him for that, PW not everyone’s taste granted.

    More great insight these past few days JJ and some top notch comments. Had to laugh, I was poolside yesterday listening to a couple of well heeled and I think pretty intelligent Sevco fans. They seem happy Pedro is off the premises and believe DMcK will be in post shortly with evertything rosy on the horizon! Celtic have just been “jammy” apparently it’ll all be different soon enough etc etc.

    PMSL indeed. Cheers, TS

  3. JJ

    After the Takeover Panel’s ruling & their application to the Court – anyone who entered into a share transaction with/for Lite – really would be making a stupid stupid move

    With this information out there, anyone who did would only have themselves to blame

    Ponzi schemes work when the ruse is hidden & typically quite sharp – this is out in the open & crude

    As an economics subject this could be quite the “undoing project “


  4. I concur.

    King is pathological.

    Everyone knows it. That’s why they gave him the reigns at Sevco and sat back and waited.

    I supported The Bunnet at the time, to my danger. He was hated. No one would listen to my superior intellect, education and knowledge of the alternative.

    It usually takes West of Scotland working class folks 25 years to come round to my way of thinking. And tell me I was right.

    They must remember the Daily Rancid and SMSM were on full attack against Fergus and Celtic supporting dunderheids fell for it. Because if it was in the Rancid it must be true.

    The SMSM were fuming that Murray’s pals at the BoS were not going to Liquidate CFC after all. They had to undermine the saviour.

    I know little of Peter Gabriel except the pop video of he can be a sledgehammer. I thought it average although I’ve just googled him and see it won several MTV awards..

    Most people agree Sledgehammer is easily trumped by Phil Collins’ in the air tonight. Not to mention three or four other Collins hits.

    If New Rangers are to be immortal, then Dave King’s cash giveaway must be never ending.

    1. Almost all of my Celtic supporting aquaintances (I was treasurer of my local CSC so that’s a few folk) were delighted we had Fergus fighting the good fight.
      He laid out his 5 year plan, we all bought in and he carried it out to the letter. I was there the day of the flag unfurling and there were a few jeers but not the level of booing I would have considered to be anything more than a few dessenters (who were quickly drowned out).
      What irked some was the £40 Mill he EARNED and walked off into retirement with. He went ALL IN at the outset and it could have gone pear shaped. There are not many who thought he would fill a 62,000 seat stadium but he had the balls to go and do it, and by doing so Celtic will (until another team build and fill a bigger stadium) be the richest club in the land.
      I agree with the majority, Fergus need at least a stand (if not the stadium) named after him.

      1. If you’re not a perfect saint, you get criticised. Even if the alternative is liquidation and death of CFC 1888.

        It’s the Scottish working class psyche, they’re mad bast*rds.

        If Fergus put his £40m into the playing squad. Pulled out another £20m and gave it to the poor of Glasgow. They’d still not be happy.

        Fans are stupid, gullible and ill educated. Jabba and Jackass know this. If you tell them vinegar and brown paper heals a serious leg knock they believe it. Their fathers ran about with brown paper tied to their legs.

        Fergus vocally promised no one individual would own more than 50% of the club ever again. That greater than 51% would eternally be in the hands of fans.

        So how come Desmond Dermott owns the show?

        I don’t hold that against Fergus and I think fan ownership is disaster waiting to happen for every football club. But it was a promise.

        Fergus deserves a bespecled bronze head in the reception on a plinth..

    2. “No one would listen to my superior intellect, education and knowledge of the alternative.

      It usually takes West of Scotland working class folks 25 years to come round to my way of thinking. And tell me I was right”

      Blowing your own trumpet a bit eh?

  5. Not seeing Peter Gabriel live is probably my biggest musical regret. (I’d have loved to have seen Pink Floyd in their pomp but don’t see that as a regret as I was too young to appreciate it. )
    PG has always been ahead of the curve in live performances and I absolutely love the Growing Up DVD but on reflection, the Secret World tour is in my opinion one of the best live performances I’ve ever seen. The components of his supporting band on that tour was incredible.
    Stop Making Sense by Talking Heads being the other contender.
    Apologies for going off on the tangent !!!

  6. Club 1872 bought the Ashley shares.

    If they vote with King to allow debt into equity, they are cutting their own throats. It is business counter intuitive. The dilution of their own shareholding.

    They must vote to keep the loans as never ending loans and defend their own equity position. Or are they controlled by King?

    1. If they behave as a concert party then they are a concert party.

      Especially if they act counter to normal self interest. It’s just not Capitalism!

    2. They will be persuaded to put new money in to maintain their shareholding, not realising that thru week be paying money to stand still.

      I still don’t see how this helps any of the loanees get any money back. The company still isn’t worth anything more so they just end up with a lower amount. Unless DCK somehow sells some of his new shares direct to club 1872. But the effective proc he paid will need to be a lot lower than 20p.

      NOAL being the sole lendor coming forward just doesn’t make sense. All may be revealed later this month….

  7. I reckon the only chance of a successful share issue is:
    A) a mind boggling decision on King in court; or
    B) an issue using non-regulated means.

    For the latter the company Brewdogs (who incidentally make some lovely beers) and their share issues would give an idea what I mean. It’d need to be inordinately successful to convert those loans while maintaining current shareholding percentages by the three bears. It’s a fair bet even a share issue would only see a partial debt/equity swap and some restructuring. It’s also a fair bet that the punters money will be used to repay the debt and not invested in the team. It’s a mugs issue in any case.

  8. Quick follow up to the last few days and a request of anyone in the know who reads this:

    I believe I have sufficient documentation to nail King and RIFC’s auditor for knowingly submitting falsified accounts. This is a crime in every country in the world, even 3rd World cesspools where the rule of law is somewhat lax. I plan on writing it up, in layman’s terms with sufficient documentation and evidence that would hold up in court, and submitting it to JJ in the coming days.

    Now the request. I am not a resident of the UK and am somewhat unfamiliar with the nuances of securities laws there. I am in the United States where such crimes, in the aftermath of Enron, are punishable by prison for the executives who sign the accounts, and license revocation of the auditor – essentially ending their professional career. What are the consequences in the UK? Can anyone point me to the relevant statutes?

    This is not a trifling matter, and it’s serious enough to make the takeover panel proceedings look like child’s play.

      1. I encourage Legal Eagles and CAs in Scotland to move up from browsing in here and get in touch with Benjamin.

        Surely the false statement by the Chairman that the accounts meet uefa FFP rules is a material falsehood of significant financial effect? Is he duping potential and current investors as to future income possibilities?

        Access to uefa competition is super critical to them but they are delinquent in matching entry standards.

        How does UEFA deal with a rogue Association that knowingly subverts UEFA Rules for one favoured domestic club? (Wrongly issuing a UEFA license to Sevco).

  9. Was around for Fergus and have the photos of the construction going i knew we were on to a winner, a good business needs a five year plan and when you are told this and told by the maker he will leave with his investment and a bit more its called honesty. most of the stuff thats hated is the normal run of the mill stuff about signings, wages etc, but the big stuff he was the man, he took the SFA to task, he built the fortress and he left if finacially sound in the knowledge there was something to build on.
    A lot has been said about Fergus but not enough credit has been given to Brian Dempsey he stuck by it and chaperoned Fergus introducing him to the celtic minded folk who would backhim and get him over the line.
    Personally it does not matter what Mcinnes does its his life and his choice and whatever they give him to throw at it he will not get them over the line, you build a house on sand then it is only a matter of time before it gives way, the sand timer is upside down and the count is on, there will not be a chase in Scotland for a long time for top spot, to attempt this would be suicidal and Celtic can up the ante anytime they consider, i believe everyone in the game knows this, they have a position of power and can call on it at will, good place to be.
    King will slither away when there is no more fools gold to be had or sooner when the winter imposes not only the cold shoulder but the threat of cold porridige, does the concert party strike up another chordor bite the dust or will the final curtain fall and drive the gullibles slighly mad, and send them radio ga ga ,god save the real Queen.

  10. Been out of circulation over the weekend and only now catching up.
    I find it incredible that any Celtic fan still dislikes Wee Fergus.
    What I liked about him was his no nonsense, straight talking. He derided the previous board as incompetent and from the off set about making Celtic a thriving successful business. Events since then have proven him correct. Success in the board room and a well run business have led to sustained success on the park. Fergus wanted to ensure that Celtic would never again rely on a sugar daddy to remain in business. Continuity of success on the park can only be sustained by continuity of success in the boardroom.

    Fergus created the biggest difference between the two Glasgow clubs. One is touting itself around the dodgiest short term markets in the world seeking a RRM / oil sheik / gullible imbecile with wealth off the radar to make Rangers great again. The other is a profitable business currently fixing the roof while sun shines, with their plans for the hotel development which will create an income stream in the future. From the off, Fergus said he was in it for the money. Many of us were frustrated at his parsimony as we desperately wanted success on the park. Fergus stuck to his guns, fixed the business and began the nurturing process which is flourishing today.

    Long may that continue. Honest men should always be welcome at Celtic Park.

  11. Another excellent article JJ.

    My first read every morning and always delivers.

    I’ve been racking my brains as to what can be done regarding the corrupt SFA, SPFL, SB&L, the bribes, the never ending line of crooks at Ibrox and Hampden, the massive tax scandals implemented and their continued support of all things Ibrox (to keep the bodies buried) and reckon a request to Panorama on BBC could possibly be a good shout.

    Whether they think it’s a big/important enough story to cover or not might be an issue, but they certainly wouldn’t back down from the threats from the Klan, given that they’ve just reported on her Maj’s dodgy offshore tax dealings.

    Here is the link to their page ‘If there is a story you would like Panorama to investigate then you can e-mail or write to us’

    I’m sure they’d take more notice of it coming from you than one of your readers.

    Keep up the outstanding work and stay safe.


    1. Some media are saying Rangers have failed in there pursuit of Derek Mcinnes.
      Miles off. He or Aberdeen have not been contacted by Rangers. There a lot of spin here. I cannot work out why the smoke screen.

      1. To give the impression that they are wealthy and vital. When they inevitably plump for Murty, the rhetoric will read: “He has been doing such a great job that he earned the right to manage Rangers (Lite).”

      2. Neither Aberdeen nor McInnes has been approached. He’s out of their League (pun intended).

        Exactly the same as the last time the SMSM confidently stated he was joining Sevco….. no approach made.

        Daily Record mind f*cking Gullibillies for fun as usual.

        I believe debt is currently £18m. It’s five more months of added debt since the accounting period 30th June. I believe three bears have put in since June but are now tapped out.

    2. Panorama sounds like a great idea … maybe Alex Thomson over on Channel 4 could share his bulky dossier to get them started?
      Just don’t go through BBC Scotland, … if you want to have a chance of success and avoid a Panorammy…

  12. Wee Nov donation ………8625

    JJ: Modest but welcome Mike on a very quiet day for donations. I can but conclude that my article was not good enough.

  13. Ring ring, ring ring…….

    Beep. Dave isn’t available, please leave a message after the tone.

    Hi Dave it’s Paul, BT have been on the phone we need cash by 4pm to pay the bills, can you emergency wire say 50k before the broadband and phones are cut off? Beep.

    Ring ring, ring ring…….

    Beep. Dave isn’t available, please leave a message after the tone.

    Hi Dave it’s Paul, Scottish power have been on the blower. Electric and gas bills again. Can you wire 150k before tomorrow noon? Any chance we can stop doing this monthly and maybes you could send four months utilities bills up front? Can you front for a bottle of Grouse for the loving cup in January?

    There’s a letter from down south. Apparently Joey Barton is owed £350k. Beep.


  14. The Sevco debt on 28th June 2017 was officially £15.9m.

    Why were Rangers playing Progress Neiderkorn at Ibrox on 29th June 2017, one day later?

    There’s a UEFA €5 million limit.

    Someone needs sacked over that.

    1. Other European clubs have been disciplined and barred from UEFA tournaments for exactly the same issue.

      Why is Sevco being let off?

  15. It’s now November. Guy Fawkes nite has come and gone.

    The Sevco accounts are a snapshot as of June. It’s five months later.

    Who can guess at their debt burn rate that the £15.9m isn’t £2m higher by now? Is it really £17.9m as of today??

  16. 1. This Sevco squad cannot pass first qualifier of Europa League.

    2. How can it possibly get through qualifiers to group stages of Champions League?

    3. There is no money to improve the squad.

    4. Expectation of European football revenue must be minimized.

    5. UEFA FFP bans them from euro competition for three years.

    6. Celtic will win the only champions league place for many years.

  17. Find it really hard to believe most things from the Glib one but NOAL will supply the cash to keep the lights on???

    There has got to be a catch. Tie into equity, some underhand payments, got to be something where the Glib one makes some $s or gets first dibs on some asset.

    If they do free up more shares who would touch them. Club/country is circling the drain.

  18. Couldn’t believe my ears listening to Hunsound on BBC Radio Scotland tonight. They slewed violently from what was wrong at Hearts, to the Appleby revelations concerning offshore tax avoidance. I was salivating at the prospect of hearing more about how Brenda was into the sharkish Birighthouse, rippers off of the poor, but what did we get? A breathless, literally, report to the effect that Dermot Desmond has money offshore. They even went so far as to send said breathless reporter to blag Desi in Munich (did they have a camera team there for the game?) Desi, as is his wont, swatted the breathless one aside, before, after many promptings from Hunnymac in the studio, we were assured that nothing illegal on Desi’s part, had gone down. What the fuck was it all about then? Apparently we are to learn more tomorrow night. J—s C—–t could this be any more blatant? Have they held career criminal King up to such scrutiny? I would like to know the following: who runs BBC Scotland–that’s radio and TV—and how the fuck are they recruited? Do they have to sing at least a few lines from the “Billy Boys”, like the copper Robertson? In the light of the recent mind-blowing revelations on this site about the corruption in the very highest places in the Scottish establishment there must be something the ordinary person can do. A donation will undoubtedly follow when finances have been checked. Fear not.

  19. Why have Celtic not pressed the nuclear button on EBTs and Rangers Tax dodging?

    Mibbees because – as revealed by the aptly named paradise papers – “Dermot Desmond’s exclusive private jet company used an offshore tax haven to avoid taxes, according to documents in the Paradise Papers”.

    Sadly the law of pots and kettles puts social taxes behind the games and playthings of rich – and pretend-rich individuals – whose toys now include the football clubs so many gullibillies and gullitims are still inclined to follow and subsidise.

    I loved the game as a kid and a young man. My decision two decades ago to give no more of my hard-earned cash to these crooks is now more than amply justified.

    The game is dead – murdered by greed.

  20. I sincerely expect Celtic FC first team players to be wearing poppies on their playing shirts at their next game.

    Can CFC, in the interests of openness and transparency, tell us if the club is owed £40k from Oldco Rangers in Liquidation or Newco Sevco Rangers in accordance with the 5 way Agreement regarding football debts?

  21. Excellent articles JJ and superb insights from a number of your contributors.

    Usual monthly donation made with pleasure – 7256.

    JJ: Thank you.

  22. Just been catching up on BBCs story on Dermot Desmond. It shows an utter ignorance of the captive insurance market and perfectly legitimate reasons for having an Isle of Man company. The primary reason for doing this is cost savings from operating in the reinsurance market rather than the primary insurance market by setting up your own insurance company. Virtually all firms with big insurance bills should and do – it’s the primary stream of financial business in the Bahamas!

    I could name you plenty of footballers, teams and managers that have reasons for offshore companies. People really need to get it out of the head that offshore means tax scam – it doesn’t! You would domicile a fund that can pick any jurisdiction to incorporate there because it won’t be subject to capital gains or income tax – meaning better returns for investors. Many readers pension products are doing just that. If you want to put your wealth in trust for your family you are passing responsibility to a trustee for it – why not pick one in a low tax jurisdiction where inheritance tax won’t be borne. A trust is a contract not an entity and can be domiciled anywhere without obligation to a country ( you pay income tax when earning the money and money is internationally portable).

    There’s nothing immoral in that story except the desperate grasping desire to get Tax and Celtic in the same headline.

    1. Nothing immoral, TJ? I’ll give you ‘nothing illegal’ but what’s ‘moral’ about avoiding tax in the country in which YOU are or were domiciled? It just means that everyone else has to step up and pay that little bit more to fill the hole you’ve created.

      I’m neither a Rangers nor a Celtic fan, so I’ve got no dog in that particular fight, but if the big beasts avoid paying significant taxes at home, it’s the little people who suffer.

      1. You couldn’t be wider of the mark Jim. My point is that that IoM company could be incorporated to be an insurance company anywhere in the world. It makes sense to choose the most beneficial place to do it. It has no country of domicile until it’s created. Mr Desmond can spend his wealth where he likes as he pays tax on it at the point of earning. You think he owes Ireland to do it there? The U.K. perhaps? Of course not as he’s paid both their dues from his earnings in each. The left over cash he can decide where and how to spend same as any of us. It’s a scam when evade tax on the earning part. Let’s be clear.

        This relates to a company he has an interest in, not personal wealth. It relates to what is effectively a cost saving on insurance by creating a subsidiary that is an insurance company to buy reinsurance rather than insurance. It’s in IoM because they have highly skilled people who know how to do this, is in a nice time zone and has good double taxation treaties. If anyone is losing it’s big insurance companies not your man in the street. I do know what I’m talking about here.

  23. I can see no evidence that the Bears have woken up to the financial plight that will soon liquidate this version of a Rangers. Do they believe the MSM myths of untold wealth to buy players and managers? Can they not read a balance sheet? Do they not realise that they are trading whilst insolvent? Where is the popular uprising?

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