noun: caravanserai: a group of people traveling together; a caravan.

Just when one thought it had all gone quiet, a lull before the perfect storm, the dogs are barking at a caravan that has ground to a shuddering halt. Jim Traynor has put together a keyboard posse to flush out McInnes and force him to do the unthinkable.

High in the saddle is Keith Jackson who had this to say yesterday:

Derek McInnes has stayed away from Aberdeen’s training session this morning as he edges closer to a move to Rangers. Record Sport understands McInnes and right hand man Tony Docherty have chosen not to oversee the first team squad to prepare for Friday night’s top flight trip to Dundee. Instead, first team coach Barry Robson and youth boss Paul Sheerin took Dons’ training at Balgownie Barracks. The move comes after we revealed this morning that McInnes could have no option but to resign from his Pittodrie post if he wants to open signing talks with the Ibrox club – following Aberdeen’s decision to boot out an official approach on Tuesday night.

It’s understood McInnes is now locked in dialogue with chairman Stewart Milne as the pair attempt to resolve this stand off. But Milne appears unlikely to back down after being infuriated by a six week saga which culminated in last week’s double header defeat for the Dons in back-to-back games against their bitter Glasgow rivals.

And, unless Milne is talked into an unlikely change of heart, McInnes will have to rip up his own contract in order to be free to open negotiations with Dave King’s Rangers regime.

Record Sport understands Rangers will agree to pay more than £1m in compensation for McInnes and Docherty if Milne gives the move his blessing.

Should the management team opt to resign in order to force the move through, then Aberdeen’s lawyers would come after them for the money – with Rangers then obliged to pick up the tab in full if McInnes is appointed as Pedro Caixinha’s replacement.”

Was this piece put together by numbers? Did the beleaguered hacks, who are on the journalistic equivalent of death row, draw lots to write a line each? If Lite had tabled an offer of £1m McInnes would be free to talk. As Lite don’t have a pot to piss in they are hoping that McInnes resigns as they would prefer to negotiate with a lead-swinging judge than with Stewart Milne. Will the 32nd degree Baron of Glen Clova step up to declare the new club penniless and ask his fellow Freemason brother for time to pay with a peppercorn interest rate?

Milne will not force an unhappy management team to see out the rest of the season as this would be counterproductive. The three rounds of back-channel negotiations with McInnes’ agent will stick in Milne’s craw. There is nothing to discuss with Lite other than to go through the motions for the media. McInnes will have been apprised of his salary and objectives viz UEFA qualification, a cup win, one defeat of Celtic and no more than a 12 point gap to the 7-in-a-row Champions.

Lite are merely flying a kite to force McInnes’ hand. They have conducted this recruitment like fly-by-night spivs that feed off faeces on the Clyde river bed. Will the SFA intervene to charge Lite with manager tapping? It’s a stick-on that they won’t as they are as diligent as the day is long at the Winter Solstice. Slippery Stewart Regan will drop by Andrew Dickson’s desk at the SFA to agree a form of words. How about the ‘tapping-up’ had not fully crystallised? Admittedly an old chestnut but a good night watchman.

It’s blatantly obvious that the SFA will do everything in their power to engineer a parity between the two Glasgow clubs. The Punch & Judy model has worked for generations. If Punch is using a loaded cosh then Judy should be given an SFA-issue crash helmet.

Lagging behind at the rear of the posse is Chris Jack who was too small to mount a horse and had to revert to a donkey. Chris has been known to hump the table legs in the Blue Room like an overexcited pup. He had this to say:

It is understood that the Gers chose to do the honourable thing by waiting until after the double-header with Aberdeen to make an approach.”

“I can see an Ibrox Rainbow, see a Rainbow, can you see a Rainbow too.” Jack is a nom de plume. His real name is Chris Pratt.

What a fucking imbecile. One could not flush out a scintilla of honour in the rogue board if one applied a thorough enema. They are as bent as a Polo Club line dance. Does Jack still get paid in Milky Bars?

One can but hope that Mcinnes takes the job and is prevented from entering Murray Park when the Sheriff Officers have secured it. King will scuttle the ship should Bannatyne add the weight of the law to the Takeover Panel’s edicts.

It would be the perfect end to a particularly sordid episode.



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25 thoughts on “Caravansevco”

  1. Rangers are trading whilst insolvent. They do not have $1,000,000 to spend They are trying to get DM on the cheap and kick the legal consequences into the Masonic future.

  2. Summed up perfectly. The Raanjurz fans are also trying to tell everyone ‘Our man is coming home to the club that made him,” who hardly featured for them in the context of over three seasons before they were liquidated in 2012.

  3. So Record Sport believe The Rangers will pay more than one million pounds, what it doesn’t say is that it will in instalments. Banks do not offer credit facilities to them so why should Aberdeen.
    If McInnes wants to accept the job then they must pay for him, in full and up front.
    A wee note to Jackson and co. Please try to report with accuracy and honesty, in time people may come to respect you instead of seeing what you are at present, syncopathic fantasists.

  4. My sources tell me Lord No Surrender is dusting down one of his rugs for a no unfair sporting advantage repeat verdict in the mcinnes tapping trial despite the two trfc wins the same spurces say LNS has been convinced aberdeen were unlikely to score over the 180 mins anyway and one goal was proof of the no unfair.

    Bannatyne does have a lot of showers to clean in his gyms but he surely could have slipped out a reply to TOP by now.

  5. No-one will come out of this shoddy affair with any credibility (some , but not all of the players had credibility to lose!!):

    MacInnes has lost the most. Talk about ‘lose-lose’. If the Ibrox board won’t meet their financial commitments, or the terms of the deal is unacceptable to him, then he walks away. The fact that he was willing to consider informal overtures, while under contract, means the Aberdeen support and players have lost their trust in him. Even if he was to resist the Ibrox blandishments, his stay at Pittodrie will be short.

    Regular readers of this blog are well-informed as to the disfunctionality at Ibrox. The financial position is precarious in the extreme and the current board offer no certainty for future direction, surviving day to day in full crisis management mode. Why anyone would take on the manager role, when the supporter base have no grounding in reality, suggests they are signing up for mission impossible. With a well-grounded board and sound finances the Rangers managerial job should be a plum post, but until these foundations are established managers will be grasped like lifejackets only to be shortly jettisoned after they fail to work the miracle of restoring the club to a position of eminence.

    All Stewart Milne’s kow-towing to the SPFL/SFA party line has proved useful. He is just one of Regan’s useful idiots. If he had insisted on the games’ regulators enforcing their rule-book rather than bending over backwards for the benefit of one club, then the administrators would have been over a barrel. He has no leverage to force the governing bodies to take action. He needs to move quickly and secure the future of his club on the managerial side by an early credible appointment. Those with magic hats and caravans need not apply. I fear AFC will join the list of creditors.

    You have astutely summed up the SFA/SPFL position. Rather than governing for the benefit of all involved in football, they see Scottish football as having ‘the Old Firm’ as its unique selling point. How they would have hated the 1980s.

    Last of all the obnoxious SMSM. Words fail me on the depths they have been willing to go to destabilise and undermine a well run club for the benefit of another. Beware if a provincial clubs dreams to challenge the duopoly.

    1. They are dotting the i’s and crossing the t’s as I write. It’s a done deal. Milne capitulated and gave them time to pay. More fool him. Sreachan and McLeish EBT on shortlist to replace him.

      1. He’ll enjoy an empty stadium in the next few months then unless he genuinely has a very strong candidate to replace. He’s already hugely unpopular with the support for his ‘move on’ rubbish and if he allows them to pay it off like a Littlewoods clubbie he’ll be even more unpopular. What a shambles.

        McLeish – not wlecome.
        Strachan – not wanted, especially if he takes Mcghoo as an assistant.

      2. JJ I could have told you couple of weeks ago he was beginning to doubt if he could handle managing Rangers, felt it too big. Believe me, that is the truth. It came from his own lips. Reason he took two days to come to a decision.The Rangers board never had the opportunity to talk. Rangers dodged a bullet in my humble opinion.

      3. Too big?
        Absolute Wishful thinking .. truth is more like there were two big red flags for McInnes
        first ; your prospective employers can’t even afford the compensation and almost certainly therefore have no way ever of funding a viable challenge thus giving you a fighting chance of success.
        Second ;social media awash with disgusting statements from cavemen fans aimed at
        your long term deputy

        No.. he knew he would be sacked after a few hidings from Celtic .

        Rangers may own the media but they don’t own Scottish football anymore . Those days have long long gone . They are also rans and won’t be back in any of our lifetimes.

  6. If this was going on in the English Premier League it would be front page news , how can a manager who has just lost 2 games to a team he was expected to take at least 4 points from get away with this , to come out after Sunday’s game and complain about all the media driven rumours whilst all the time knowing that he was going to the opposition is boarding on illegal, people in the corporate world get dragged into court for this .

  7. There are loadsa better managers for aberdeen than mcinnes. Ross aitken and hopkin in the championship for a start. Oneill wright even good old steve mclaren might move his brolly north

  8. Readers of this blog no doubt recognise that the power and reach of RIFC is all encompassing.
    And a Career Criminal is the chairman having taken over the mantle from a Knight of the Realm, the tentacles of the club permeate all levels of Scottish Society. RIFC are the undeniable force in Scottish Football which can live by their own rules and have no requirement to observe or accommodate rules and regulations. They exist in their own universe and the compliance of every organisation or body or person of influence is absolute by hook or by crook, by brother and craft or by simple allegiance….. thats the reality I’m afraid, sad but true

  9. Lambeg Drummer Boy

    Come they told you
    And manage the Huns.
    The fans will welcome you,
    A ‘proddygal’ son,
    Who knows the songs they sing,
    The bigoted ones.
    Dave has no cash to bring
    So you will get none.
    But arrogant Huns
    Demand trophies won
    To stop the Hoops’ run.
    Your nightmare’s begun!

  10. Very busy chappies?
    – Lord Bannatyne on the Takeovers and Mergers panel regarding DK and the 3 Bears
    – SFA Compliance Officer investigating the issue of a UEFA licence to RFC in 2011.

    I know that they have a lot of stables to cleanse, but why:
    – is it taking sooo looong for them to issue their verdicts?
    – have there been no questions posed by the Scottish media on this inactivity?

    Surely these are fundemental issues that need to be clarified in order to “move on” and, perchance, punish anyone guilty of durty deeds?

    Oh, maybe we’re all waiting to see what the Bold Derek decides first, before moving onto to those pesky questions?

  11. If TFC’s business plan revolves around getting some European income, surly Mr McInnes track record doesn’t ‘LIE’. Let the “Banter Years” continue. 🙂

  12. BBC Scotland:
    Rangers have failed with an appeal against the red card Ryan Jack received in Sunday’s 2-1 win away to Aberdeen.
    The midfielder was dismissed against his former club following a challenge on the Dons’ Stevie May, catching the striker after winning the ball.
    It was the fourth time this season the 25-year-old has been sent off, although two of those were later rescinded.
    Jack will serve a three-game suspension.

    Rangers have failed in their appeal against Ryan Jack’s most recent red card. He was sent off after a “disgusting”*** career-threatening challenge on Stevie May in Sunday’s game against Aberdeen. It was Jack’s FORTH red card of the season.
    The Dons are still waiting for the swelling to reduce on May’s ankle before a decision on a scan, and is obviously out of the next game away to Dundee.
    *** Chris Commons’ description of the “tackle” live on Sky Sports.

  13. Strachan for Liebrox? That would be classic.Could you picture it? Mind you,surely not long till admin/liquidation.Bottle merchant McInnes,by not taking the poisoned chalice has made himself unpopular with both sets of fans.Oh Derek,where did it all go wrong?
    P.S. I’ll try to find out about awards,you would have been a shoe in….

  14. I see that Aberdeen and McInnes have knocked them back. Absolutely hilarious. You really cannot make this stuff up. How long can this insane pantomime continue to stagger forward?

  15. ahm sayn,



    clubs n cumpnys ur con commMitant

    ‘nat naw.

    Is there a word re-incompetence?

    Dunning-Kruger again!

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