A Last-Ditch Pitch By The SFA

The SFA hosted an event on Tuesday evening at The Ailsa Craig Suite in the Five Star Trump Turnberry Hotel. A ‘Luxury Collection‘ resort hotel. After copious amounts of claret there was no need to make one’s way back to Glasgow or in Pathetic Petrie’s case Edinburgh as the best suites in the hotel had been booked by the blazers. If one had the foresight to leave one’s SFA-issue brown brogues outside one’s suite for buffing, they would be returned before breakfast with the required SFA Turd-Polished sheen.

The Ailsa Craig Suite is described as a fresh, airy room with large picture windows overlooking the Championship golf courses and beyond. It is apparently an ideal space for private dinners or lunches for up to 80 people. The private dining rooms of Hotel Du Vin evidently did not have the capacity to accommodate the movers (On) and shakers of Scottish football.

I understand that a  sumptuous five course dinner, with a delectable amuse-bouche palate refresher, was on offer. There would be little change out of £200 per head. Having stayed overnight it would be remiss of the SFA not to take in eighteen holes and book oneself out for the day. Sinecures allow that kind of latitude.

According to Hugh McDonald in The Daily Mail club chairmen perused a document which proposed a radical revamp of the SFA prior to the beginning of season 2020/21. As I write my mole informs me that some of the SFA are still at the bar availing themselves of a 25 years old Macallan that was stored in a Sherry cask for added sweetness. Unsurprisingly some at 3 a.m. are in a ‘tired and emotional’ state. However the bar will remain open for as long as the SFA deem it appropriate. The barman might have to await the first golf flight of the morning prior to divesting himself of his cummerbund and bow-tie.

One unnamed club chairman stated:

‘We are standing at the crossroads for Scottish football. Decisions must be made in the short-term for medium and long-term benefit. The SFA can regain some control by the appointment of a very strong, outstanding chief executive but the more likely scenario is that it loses its power to the clubs.’

McDonald reveals that one scenario being contemplated is to allow the SFA to control the international squad, minor football and administration. Clubs would take over matters of governance, promotion and sponsorship.

Of course the latter would be a big ask, hence the SFA’s pitch for the status quo to be maintained.

“Those seeking change want a revamped Scottish body in place before a new television deal is negotiated. The proposals have been put in a discussion paper and have been the subject of informal talks among leading figures who are seeking change after becoming dismayed by a series of crises. Many of these were prompted by the SFA (or) actually caused by them.”

The summer tour of South and Central America – which quite incredibly is called Project Brave – has led to the engagement of one of Peter Lawell’s eyebrows to express his disapproval. One more eyebrow would have resulted in anathema

As I wrote in jj-passim the SFA and SPFL are competing for the same sponsors. The SPFL have only 13 members of staff. The SFA 180. The latter evidently has the larger sales team but an inferior product.

McDonald asserts:

“The main points of debate between the top clubs fall broadly into two options.The first is to revamp both the SPFL and the SFA. The second is to scrap both authorities with one body formed, with independent aid and advice, to run the professional game.”

I have proposed on several occasions completely scrapping the SFA and subsuming its functions in an enhanced SPFL. The blazers, the sub-committee gobshites, should be dismissed with prejudice.

There is a consensus that Doncaster and his team have a good track record in negotiating with broadcasters. As much as I would like to see Doncaster on a bonfire of his own vanities it might not be prudent to usher in a new team to renegotiate at this juncture. A business relationship has been forged which should squeeze out a few more million going forward.

However let me break it down for the hard of thinking. This is a self-preservation sales pitch by the beleaguered SFA. They might offer the bone of one more non-executive director on the SFA board, but they will fight tooth and nail to preserve their brown brogues and blazers.

One can but hope that the SFA’s entreaties fall on deaf ears and that the discarded blazers and brogues are being sold on E-Bay prior to next season.

These corrupt bastards sat on their hands while Rangers engaged in industrial cheating. The lied to provide same with a UEFA licence. The lied some more to cover up their complicity. They allowed a compromised Campbell Ogilvie to subvert an SPFL commission. They refused a review of their corruption and incompetence. They are incapable of fair play.

Take them out now or Scottish football will remain mired in their corrupt cesspool.


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12 thoughts on “A Last-Ditch Pitch By The SFA”

  1. In my country such largesse using other peoples money would mean resignation, in Scotland it is signed off with a funny handshake.

  2. Do you really think a ‘change’ for the good of Scottish football will happen? Or will it be a change to stop 10 in a row! Seems to me no change at the sfa is for the good of the whole of scottish football until the lies are investigated.

  3. Here is the menu from the dinner

    Blue Thai Inn Soup
    Larkhall Pate

    Lamb Succulence
    Five knuckle pork
    Benedict’s Eggs(v)-OFF

    Ulster Red Handcaught Snapper.

    served with FA mined potatoes and carrots orange

    Hampden Mess with Brysons surprise and Topping Ralph

    Lanarkshire blue cheese.

    EB Tea and Tim’s FU coffee.

    Vintners J White from his Joburg cellar collection.

    Music. The Loudon Tavern Flautists with Ali Gardiner on Lambeg

  4. Good article JJ. I absolutely believe the Police should be all over the fraud which was committed in 2011/12, we are talking of a crime where the proceeds of such were in excess of £30 Milion pounds (and quite probably a lot more).
    The continuing absence of the Compliance Officer and his report tempts me (as a concerned citizen) to call Police Scotland to register a missing persons alert.

    1. If the Compliance Officer has been ordered to stand down from his review of SFA licencing procedures then it’s time for Dermot Desmond, as the major Celtic shareholder at the time the fraudulent licence application was waved through, to step up to the plate and make an official complaint to Police Scotland.
      There are too many people within our football authorities who would be severely damaged if the truth came out, hence the CO spending 5 months doing exactly what?
      Lawwell and the Celtic board should be all over this.
      The club has potentially lost millions because an act of fraud carried out in broad daylight.
      Many of those involved are still in situ, probably smug and content that they are untouchable when they should be in the dock facing serious criminal charges which carry equally serious jail sentences.
      Enough is enough. The SFA can’t be trusted to investigate themselves if we have learned anything over the last 6 years.

  5. Additional contribution made. Keep shining a the light. I would have seen the Turnberry Soiree as more of a general discussion and meeting of minds. If there was anything other than some cosying up for like minded brothers I would be surprised. It is time for all “good men” of the 5 way agreement to come to the aid of the SFA Self preservation Society. Whilst the Hampden relocation, the Regan Shambles etc is a good stick to beat the SFA SPS with my guess would be that Andy’s boy, the Compliance Officer’s report is being delayed as a bit of a makeweight, though everyone already knows what he’s found. The key is what they will do with it and how they will cover it up whilst keeping any credibility if it ever sees the light of day. Do not be misled, its already written, read, bound and gagged. ( Was Regan pushed because of the report?). For the cover up of 2012 to continue all parties must be of the same mind, with no leaks or rogues. If the SFA SPS were beaten too much and disbanded without their blazers and perks and Soup spill McRae and Piss Poor Petrie were let go then who would ensure that the shenanigans of 2012 are preserved? Those 2 vagabonds must be kept in situ now Regan has gone. I mean, what if a legit person or new broom appeared? Could they, as a moral professional person or not a brother, blow the whistle on the Stitch up of 2012? Perish the thought!
    Piss Poor has bided his time. it may be time for Soup Spill to assume an honorary role as Piss Poor, at long last, takes the top position. The Laptop Loyal have got in line regarding big EBT taking the managers job for that much needed moola for him. One base covered. Before they appoint a CEO and my money is still on the PFA CEO Agent lawyer pundit etc etc ( wheres a Gordon Smith when you need one! 🙂 ) there needs to be agreement on structure, deflection and preservation.
    And also, its all about timing. These “changes” when they come will aid and abeit Piss Poor’s “Lets move on” mantra. there will be no re-investigation of 2012.

  6. On a separate point. There has been much publicity regarding the home cup ties that the establishment club has enjoyed, sometimes the number of these has defied mathematic probability. Due to a light being shone, very strongly from this site, on this anomaly there may have been some amendment to this practice this year however think about this. The rules post-split ensure each club a number of home games. The computer at the start of the season ( as Soup Spills draws always seemed to) seemed to favour RFC with significant home games when cash flow was required by RFC. Post split the rules are clear. each team must have a specific number of home games. These games for RFC will be money spinning cash injections against their immediate competitors. The League Leaders and AFC will require to visit Ibrox for the THIRD time this season post split. Strange Circumstance. Requiring to play these teams 4 times over the season, RFC gets to play 3 of these matches at home. Ok, perhaps a welcome cash injection however, would this also, thinking back to the start of the season, be also deemed a sporting advantage too should Pedro have succeeded in being in with a shout of the league title this season or am I just seeing ghosts? 🙂

  7. Hi JJ, another great article and a much-anticipated read on the morning commute. It really is so dispiriting to see the SFA predictably digging in despite the evidence of corruption and collusion piling up around them. A complete embarrassment of an organisation. One just has to see the usual dysfunctional (GIRUY) response from them in the hiring of McLeish. As you said, what is that clown McRae doing anywhere near Scottish football? He is a clueless dinosaur and should walk away for the good of the game and his own reputation. Why punters pay to watch any of this utterly corrupt farce of a sport in this dark wee country of ours, is beyond me.

  8. Latest SFA ‘bright idea’ is purchasing Hampden from Queens Park. Not sure whether the clubs will go for the governing body taking on a ‘white elephant’ requiring a significant investment, which will impact on the amounts clubs receive. More magical thinking!!

    Mind you Hampden might prove useful as an alkternative home venue, should a member club run into difficulties & be unable to use their stadium.

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