Mutiny On The Sevco Buses

The hype from Ibrox, crafted by Yuanker Traynor and articulated by the SMSM, had many neutrals and a significant number of Celtic fans forming a view that Rangers Lite would prevail on Sunday. When Simunovic was sent off by a bent DUP-facing assistant referee, I knew that the fix was in. Those who read my exclusive pieces that were gleaned from a Craig Whyte sales pitch are now aware that Lite have long known that they will be the beneficiaries of ‘honest mistakes.’ I fully expected a penalty from El Buffalo Morelos taking a dive. Having clutched his face in agony from the air current generated by Simunovic’s elbow, one fully expected his cheating to continue in the box.

El Buffalo is, not to put too fine a point on it, a Colombian village idiot who would have probably ended up being a drugs mule had he not been signed by Independiente Medellín. HJ Helsinki signed him, loaned him back to the vendor, and finally gave up on their 500,000 Euro investment when Caixinha came calling. They discovered early that Morelos has a poor first touch and a tendency to disappear in games where he is tested by a robust defence. The idea of Morelos playing in the EPL is as ridiculous as his much vaunted wholly fictitious move to the CSL with Beijing Renhe. How much does a village idiot cost in an inflated transfer market? The SMSM, reading from Yuanker’s script, peddled all the way to £12m before publishing the narrative that he was worth £15m in the close season and that Rangers Lite had shown ambition by retaining him. Are these so-called journalists congenitally stupid? Do they get by with one neuron more than their average reader? El Buffalo could have been purchased and loaned back as was the case with Celtic’s transfer business with St. Mirren.

The penny has finally dropped at the Penny Arcade. ‘The People‘ hurled more than abuse at Morelos when he raised his shaved idiot’s head above the parapet. In a bygone age he would have been pelted with rotten fruit. Fast forward to Sunday and the missiles included one pound coins and lighters, some of which drew blood. Three well-heeled ‘People‘ in the BA lounge decided to accost Sinclair and suggest that he was:

“A Black Fenian Bastard” and “A fucking taig cunt.” 

He was invited to have sex with himself. My source informs of the following colourful epithets:

“Go fuck yourself you black paedophile cunt.”

The air was so RRM blue that the police were called. The abusers were removed from their flight to Belfast and arrested. The desk sergeant, no stranger to a lusty rendition of The Billy Boys, empathised with their plight. A black Celtic player in a lounge that is the preserve of the DUP on match days is just not on, irrespective of whether he participated in the match or not, as was the case with Sinclair. Does he not know his place? Does he not know that the DUP are the people? The tail that wags the Tory dog take their Sectarian bigotry to a different paradigm.

Career Criminal King, who claims to be short of a bob or two, no longer ‘jets in.’ Did he take the bus from the Airport to Buchanan Street?  He was probably informed that Douglas Gordon Ross was on point and that it was Lite’s game to lose. Had El Buffalo scored from two yards out into an empty net, King would have partied like someone who had just successfully bribed the SARS number two, and the financial controller of Umgeni Water in the same day. Sadly the most excitement King had on the day was shaking himself dry in the Ibrox Executive lavatory in The Thornton Suite.

Graeme Murty looked in need of a blood transfusion in his post-match press conference. Had John Brown stuck his teeth in to him, or did Brown settle for a somewhat robust monologue? My source suggests the language used was RRM blue:

“Ten fucking men you useless cunt. “

Dear oh deary me. Not the kind of language to empower the interim first team coach.

But what did Brown expect from Murty’s rag tag bargain basement bag of loanees? Provident cheques can only stretch so far. A draw would have been the ideal result for King as he would not have had to shell out for win bonuses, while repeating the mantra that Lite now had parity with Celtic. King needed a CL place to have any chance of keeping the Messengers At Arms at bay. I’m sure there is no truth in the rumour that the latter are performing doughnuts in The Albion Road Car Park, with the necessary permissions from Close Asset Finance.

If I were The Magnificently Maned Adulterer I would ask King to stay away as when King turns up for a final against Hibs or a season defining encounter with Celtic, Lite invariably lose.

In the Life of Brian the oppressed Judeans ask what have the Romans ever done for us. The same challenge could be made of King.

Lite have summarily dismissed two managers. One of whom, Mark Warburton, was informed that they had accepted his letter of resignation. When he asked to see said letter, that he had no knowledge of, Stewart Robertson unsurprisingly demurred. The employment tribunal coming down the pike will be a busman’s holiday for King.

One can but hope that the wheels don’t come off the Sevco Sitcom in April at Hampden. A mutiny from a cold-shouldered board and disgruntled fans might bring the curtain down.









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22 thoughts on “Mutiny On The Sevco Buses”

  1. Less than 2 weeks till King has to comply with the COS ruling and the silence from Ibrox and the Scottish media is deafening.
    If the cold shoulder is implemented then how will they juggle the ST process with no normal banking services available?
    Will the players be queuing up to be paid in cash?
    Ditto the day to day creditors?
    Given Stuart Robertson’s assertion that this is only a problem for King and not the club let’s see how that turns out.
    Any credibility he had left flew out the window when he clained that the club was well funded for the rest of the season then the following week pawned parts of the infrastructure to secure a loan from Close Bros.
    Nobody in the media blinked an eye at this sleight of hand.
    Of course we know that the Scottish media only blink when they are told to or else they will be cast adrift from the magic circle and no longer privy to the world class food at Murray Park.
    So everyone stays on message and content to copy and paste whatever is fed to them, no matter how ridiculous it is, the £10/11/12m bid for Morelos being the pick of the bunch.
    With CL glory and monies now out of reach till season 19/20 at the earliest and lots of smoke swirling around the premis of a UEFA licence for next season what next.
    The latest audited financials read like a horror story as has been the case since Newco’s birth recording an operating loss in every year of it’s existence.
    With no debt for equity swop on the horizon the licencing waters are well and truly muddled.
    Will the SFA licencing committee see through the mud and wave through the application from Ibrox?
    Given what’s gone before will someone on the committee contact HMRC and confirm that there are no overdue social taxes, unlike 2011 when this basic backstop before the approval of any application was deemed unnecessary as all the applicants were as honest as the day is long?

  2. You mention the name of John Brown and all my mind can go to is a purely bitter bitter man who used to turn out for the old rfc, he didn’t play football he just kicked his way thro’ 90 minutes of mind numbing mediocrity for which he was paid . Is he actually paid by the new lot or just hangs about like a smell?
    You are also correct that there was no connection with the wee guy more or less and once again the referee could just not get his card out quick enough to obey the instruction from the linesman, in all the years I have watched and played football I have never seen a linesman do what he done to ensure that Sumunovich was going off early and his team left a man short, thankfully the 10 men where up to the task and prevailed once again.

  3. Will the Ranger’s team bus arrive at away grounds with a bag of cash to pay for the tickets sold to visiting supporters? The ‘cold shoulder’ solutions to paying creditors will hark back to the biscuit tin years.

    1. At this juncture, any team with upcoming home fixtures against Lite should be thinking long and hard about extending any “credit” via an away ticket allocation. April should get very interesting. At this juncture DK has led them a long and merry dance so I’d imagine TPE will hit them fast and hit them hard. A precedent simply must be set..

  4. JJ, Do you have any word on when Warburton’s Industrial Tribunal is going to happen? I thought it had all been abandoned.

  5. Let’s hope the Airport Race Relations Bears get a custodial spell for their troubles…

    I’m assuming there has been ‘radio silence’ on them from the Scottish media.

    I find it sickening enough that they exist.. But being ‘well heeled’ enough to ‘jet in and out’ to their games is truly vomit inducing.

    Maybe they should donate some cash to their skint club!

  6. Well that’a real turn up for the books as the SFA has not yet given Alistair Johnston fit and proper status which is pending the result of the Compliance Officers review of the fraudulent UEFA licence application.
    The implication is that he was Oldco Chairman when the application was made therefore by submitting the paperwork knowing that social taxes were overdue, the £2.8m wee tax bill, a fraud was being knowingly perpetrated.
    Why has it taken so long for this to be made public and why is the review not been completed after 6 months by the Compliance Officer?

    1. More to this revelation than meets the eye right in the middle of the UEFA licencing process for next season.
      As someone has already pointed out they can’t lay this at Craig Whyte’s door, much as they would like to as he took over in May 2011, months after the fraudlulent licence had been waved through the SFA process.
      Hopefully we are nearer bringing those who perpetrated the fraud and those involved in the subsequent cover up to justice.
      No wonder Regan has jumped ship plus the claims today that sectarian chanting/singing inside the stadiums.
      Bear in mind that these revelations are just the tip of a huge iceberg which could lead to criminal charges and the collapse of the SFA.
      No one will miss them.

  7. If I was a Sevco fan I could dream of beating Celtic next month in the semifinals with the standard assistance of the Masons in Black I could dream of winning the cup in May I could dream about winning all of their remaining matches this season and even winning the league ( stop laughing) I could dream about a $30,000,000 war chest to buy a competent team that makes Progres in the Champions League.
    How do you turn dreams into reality? With a plan. With a strategy. With the resources They have none of these requirements. They are ineligible for Europe. They can only sign loanees as they have no cash. They are struggling to meet this month’s wages in full. No one with a brain can invest in such a club without losing all their money. King’s arrogance will take them down The only question is who will stand on the marble steps and declare the liquidation process.

    1. I was very interested in your comment regarding the experiences of your brother, post Glasgow derby games. Have you heard anything from him regarding the recent most one.
      My wife is a nurse and worked in A&E in the old viccy. I remember over the years, she and many of her colleagues’ dread of a Celtic victory in this fixture. It invariably led to an increase in violence related admissions due to a certain outcome in this game. She and some of her fellow medical professionals favoured the green side, but almost certainly knew the consequences of a Celtic victory.
      She has some interesting recollections of her time in the dept on these occasions.

  8. After Warburon’s departure, the Rangers job was offered to Tony Pulis.

    This deal was accepted and signed by Pulis and Robertson representing Rangers. The deal was signed in London.

    Following his signing, there was a call from Pulis to the club (having done a bit of late homework) saying that he was a practicing Catholic.

    The deal was shredded and ended right there.

    Now THAT’S a story and exclusive which doesn’t reach the press.

    That surely is worthy of note.

  9. The dramatic hype from last week was stymied by Rodgers tactical nous and better quality.
    The semi final is now of paramount importance to RIFC. It is time for all good brothers to come to the aid of the new club. I expect Murtys men to prevail.
    Always in Scotland the protectionist actions of the corrupt cabal never cease to amaze me. The appointment of Doncaster to the SFA is astounding. That’s not circling the wagons, that’s not looking outside the bubble!!
    I see on TV from the other side of the world an article on unreported sectarianism in Scottish Football on BBC World news!!! Was this reported in UK also??

    I follow these

  10. Ralston at the Record still peddling the DCK millions line

    “Rangers don’t need a major rebuild this summer, but their squad still requires more than fine tuning and their humming and hawing on Murty’s future has already cost them a tilt at January Bosmans.

    They may be able to bank on Dave King’s millions but time is a currency in short supply as they bid to find a dominant central defender with pace, a full-back who can defend and a midfield grafter capable of grabbing the most demanding game by the scruff of its neck.

    More than that, they will likely need a presence in the dugout who can pull it all together and inspire a challenge based on results his side are achieving, rather than defeats and draws his arch rivals may suffer.

  11. The funny thing about Douglas Redcard’s touchline antics was that they won Celtic the game.Rodgers had made a mess of his selection and tactics but going to ten men he got balance and counter into the latter half of the game.murty made a mess of his adjustments Cummings for moremisses at the red card could well have seen trfc win.

  12. Why bother with January Bosmans who would be looking for hefty signing on fees when you can pick up players on loan with just their wages to cover.
    Or find a sucker team whose major shareholder also has a significant shareholding in Newco and arrange the transfer of sucker teams best player at no immediate cost.
    Now that’s a belter, buy now, pay later.
    Docherty is on a 4 year plus deal with the transfer fee changing hands when the ST monies roll in.
    As we know Close Bros already have a significant claim on the ST monies.
    If there is not enough money to pay Docherty’s fee in May does the paperwork get ripped up and he teturns to Accies, meanwhile Newco have qualified for Europe next season using a player they never paid for?

  13. Something’s afoot at Hampden.
    The leaking of Alistair Johnston’s not yet fit and proper status is a most unlikely event and the timing is even more intriguing.
    With the Compliance Officer 6 months into his review of the 2011 UEFA licence someone has decided to let a rabbit loose.
    If AJ signed off on the application in his position as Chairman of Oldco, is he being offered up as the sacrificial lamb?
    No fit and proper status for you, you naughty boy, bye, end of enquiry.
    Well, not quite. The application was fraudulent, fraud is a serious criminal offence. Other clubs lost money as a result of the sleight of hand that ended in Oldco being granted a UEFA licence.
    This was never your run of the mill administration error, far from it.
    Those involved knew exactly what they were doing.
    The Compliance Officer review might exonerate the SFA in any conspiracy theory and instead focus on the self certification aspect of the applicants, heavily relying on them to be honest and upstanding citizens.
    Of course Oldco were anything but and bare faced lies were told to HMRC and the SFA on a number if occasions.
    I wonder if AJ has volunteered to be thrown under a bus or if this startling transparency from the SFA is a surprise to him?
    At the end of the day a major fraud has been perpetrated on Scottish football.
    Those responsible should be brought to justice, 6 years down the road or not.

  14. When will this entity finally succumb to the harsh realities of life. You cannot spend what you haven’t got. Menschs disclosure really saddens me in this day and age and I have no reason to disbelieve it. I would’ve thought Pedro was also a practising catholic so why the difference. Pedro was shite so maybe once bitten and all that.

    I pray that Close brothers are ruthless beyond recognition. They might prove to be the straw who broke the camels back. Has there been verification of the attack on el buffalo. If so, I must’ve missed it.

    Still no password JJ

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