Burlesque: an absurd or comically exaggerated imitation of something, especially in a literary or dramatic work; a parody.
The Sevco Sitcom has been compared to Mrs Brown’s Boys (MBB) as they both are pretending to be an entity, or in the latter’s case a gender, that is not their own. I find MBB as funny as syphilis. I avoid both at all costs. However when it comes to the Sevco Sitcom no-one needs to can the laughter. Who could have predicted Armageddon would be so funny?
There is something distinctly Catholic about all things Rangers. A Holy Trinity if you will. There is Rangers The Father – RIFC Plc. There is Rangers The Son – TRFCL. And finally as we discovered from the architects and signatories of The Five Way Agreement, we have Rangers The Holy Ghost – The Metaphysical Entity that is RFC.
The latter was dreamed up by the SPFL’s pet walrus, Rod Mackenzie. It’s more of a poltergeist than a Holy Ghost if truth be told. Any attempt to deny its existence, continuation, and first sighting in 1873 is quickly condemned by the SMSM. There are those who point to its incorporation in 1899 and its exorcism, but the ethereal entity is as ubiquitous as ever.
State broadcaster BBC Scotland have made Continuation editorial policy. Should any TV/Radio/Print journalist broadcast or publish anything which flies in the face of Continuation, the facts if you will, then they will be subject to disciplinary proceedings and possible dismissal. Let me break this down for you:
- BBC Editorial Policy, since 2012, is to lie about Rangers or face the sack.
Every time one pay’s one’s licence fee one is paying for the proliferation of a lie.
Since Dave King started playing NOAL and mouse with the City Watchdog, the sitcom became more of a tease. One knows that he is naked under the feathers and that he is about to catch a chill. One knows that King’s beleaguered board are trading whilst insolvent as they cannot pay their bills as they fall due. As I exclusively revealed on Monday – subsequently pawned off as his own by my plagiarist in chief – one or more creditors have raised a court order to freeze any cash held by Rangers The Son, or as I affectionately call them Rangers Lite, deposited in any bank.
Every financial institution in the UK knowns that The Rangers Football Club Limited are shysters.
As our ursine friends frantically move the feathers to avoid us stealing a glance at King’s front, or heaven forfend, his full-fronted glibness, King cannot wait to get off stage and bum a fag (which takes on a entirely different meaning chez Mark Dingwall) from his bent brief James Blair.
The Corrupt Consigliere was recently called upon to assess the impact of a share offer. King has until close of business one week from today, on the 30th March, to put up or forever shut up.
The official first cut-off date for a UEFA application is the 31st March but as this is a Saturday, Friday the 30th March is the date to circle on one’s calendar. Given that the ursine debt has not been converted into equity, RIFC will not be compliant. However if one reverts to my Trinity analogy keep one’s eye on Rangers The Son, the SFA member club, as this will be the focal point of any FFP compliance. TRFCL’s accounts are overdue. Will they be massaged to give the SFA their regular pretext to provide a green light?
Harold Wilson once opined that a week is a long time in politics. Apropos Rangers Lite I demur. The next week for the Sevco Project will be fast and loose. The feathers of the burlesque show will fall to the floor to reveal the full horror of King playing chicken with the Takeover Panel, Court of Session, Crown Prosecution Authority of South Africa and last but not least UEFA.
Does the Corrupt Consigliere receive air miles for all the business he brings to Anderson Strathern? If he did he could clock up more air travel than DCI Robertson and his pert assistant as they chased their tails around the globe. The Rolls of the Court of Session have thrown up this doozy:
Tuesday 1st May 2018
Procedure Roll (4 days)
A184/16 The Rangers Football Club Ltd v Charles Green & co
With good money at a premium, King and his bent brief have decided to piss some against a wall. What would the Patron Saint of Plagiarism do when faced with this news? Contact Charles Green directly or pawn off his response to me as his own? If you want this wrapped in a cryptic bow, with a soupçon of fake extrapolation to give the impression that he’s in the loop, you know where to go. I on the other hand reached out to Charles.
As much as I would like to publish his thoughts on the matter,he has asked me not to as I might compromise his defence. However I will provide the detail that when the TRFCL petition first reared its ugly head it included Mike Ashley, Sports Direct, Derek Lambias et al. One by one all the other co-accused in the petition have had the charges against them dropped and settlement agreed. TRFCL paid their costs.
So why do they continue to demonise Charles Green? Was his IPO not a great success? When the Rangers Mafia chased him out was there any debt? Was there cash in the bank? Did they have a NOMAD and an AIM listing? Did a slew of blue chip investment companies have the confidence to pony up on equity? Did he sell 40,000 season tickets in SFL II?
The answer is yes to all of the above. My personal thoughts on the matter are that any deal brokered with Ashley at that time was as good a deal as could have been achieved in the circumstances. A deal with Puma and Sports Direct, for what was to all intents and purposes a start-up company, was no mean feat.
King is pissing in the wind again. One week from now he might well be swinging in it.