The Last of the Summer Wine at Ibrox


In the Scottish Championship St. Mirren are twelve points clear with four to play. Their promotion is a given. It looks like that one of either Ross County or Partick Thistle will be demoted, with the 11th placed club participating in the play-offs.

Prior to my discussion of the post-split run-in fixtures I note that Douglas Park has returned Lazarus-like from the dead to become the deputy chairman of the beleaguered Ibrox board. I recall casting a withering eye at his 5,000 shares in Hamilton FC (Park is the second largest shareholder after Edencrest) and his 6.14% holding in RIFC and highlighting a clear transgression of SFA rules. Did Park get a pass due to the technicality that he is not a shareholder in the member club TRFCL? It must be hard for the SFA to keep track of all three ‘Rangers’ entities including Rangers The Holy Spirit; the ethereal entity that is RFC. Do the SFA have an urn containing the ashes of The Gallant Pioneers with the inscription RFC, or do they carry around their bones in an homage to Saint Spyridon of Corfu? Anything to appease their very own Continuation Jihadists.

When I first drew attention to Park having two cards up his sleeve there were howls of protest that the estimable Mr. Park was unwell; with Chinese Whispers of the big C. But here he is larger than a warmed up life:

Park in his callow youth

A cynic might suggest that he has come back to bolster season ticket sales. Others point to ‘succession planning’ due to King’s own health concerns and his concert-party Paso Doble. Succession planning where a 68 year old with a face reminiscent of Dead Sea Scrolls papyrus takes over from a 62 years old inveterate criminal. Should one accord Mr. Park some biblical gravitas? Could it be the prosaic fact that King does not want Johnston to succeed him?

Or could it be that King who promised to be more hands-on won’t make it to Hampden as there could be an outstanding warrant for his arrest? The TPE’s Section 955 petition on Tuesday seems to have been overlooked by all the ‘professional’ NUJ journalists. How remiss of them.

Clegg Johnston, Compo King and Howard Park with the St. Etienne Bicycle 

From my perspective Park’s elevation completes my Last of The Summer Wine triumvirate. Alastair Johnston will turn 70 in July. The bigwigs of the beleaguered board remind one of three addled old men trying to relive a childhood where former club Rangers existed. How we laugh at their antics as they lust after The Magnificently Maned Adulterer’s clairvoyant lover in the Louden Arms as she predicts which stall will next be free in the Ladies and uses her ESP to avoid a stall needing ten minutes.

King’s Rangers Lite seem to lack Douglas Park’s vim and need a push from Matron Murty.

I digress. As I turn my attention to the SPFL post split games, it’s evident that 1999 has loomed large in Rod Mackenzie’s spin drier aka The SPFL computer. With a girth which evokes gout envy in Yuanker Traynor he looks like he has been partying a la Prince since 1999. What has got his Nora Batty bloomers in a twist is the title decider where the mason in the black Dallas was hit by projectile coins and lighters. He soldiered on like a true third degree trooper to give Rangers a penalty for a dive in the box and reduce Celtic to eight men, thus guaranteeing a DOS/VSS powered Rangers the title. Dallas could not have been more bent if he had been bribed which would not surprise me with Sir Bribe & Lie at the Rangers helm. A contribution to the costs of replacing his double glazing would have been helpful. Dallas was and is a bigot’s bigot.

I’m not making excuses for the mindless morons who gave Dallas every incentive to put their noses out of joint but surely the events at Hampden in 2016 and Manchester in 2008 live longer in the memory?

Should Celtic win at Easter Road on Saturday 21st April, they will be champions. If they drop points and Rangers Lite rag-doll Hearts the following day, Celtic will become champions at Celtic Park on Sunday 29th April should they avoid defeat to Rangers Lite. I can envisage Celtic dropping points at Easter Road so one might yet get a second Glasgow Derby of consequence in the run-in.

Back-to back defeats might not augur well at the Ibrox sales office. Will all purchases be accompanied  by a glass of the Last of the Summer Wine?


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14 thoughts on “The Last of the Summer Wine at Ibrox”

  1. We do not have bookmakers in NZ -we have a TAB and they use sensible decimal odds. If I put $10 on Celtic to triumph I get just $13. If I put $10 on Rangers I apparently would get $33 but actually would just lose $10. The reason for the disparity is not just the gap in quality but the complete lack of interest in anyone here throwing away real dollars, The handful of Bears here are smarter than your average Bear. In thirty years I have only ever seen one person wearing a Rangers top in Wellington. A ghastly pale tourist trying to find a pub that sold Tennants ‘lager’ and Buckfast.

  2. I saw the Dead Sea Scrolls in the Kelvingrove museum in Glasgow and you are bang on with your comparison to the bus owner’s coupon – hilarious ! I think you have earned my vote over Phil this year, albeit I am not a fan of your anti-McCann crusade. But, hey we are all allowed an opinion, right ?

    JJ: Thanks

    1. By incredible coincidence a piece of bread just jumped out of my toaster with Mr Park’s image on it clearly visible I swear, it’s miraculous I tell you

  3. Rangers Lite are to be lauded on three amazing football dept decisions.

    1. The decision to keep morelos is clever because when he golden boots at this summer’s world cup for Columbia his value will soar.

    2.getting Bates off the wage bill is very very astute he will only be worth millions looking ahead which isn’t trfc class

    3. Bringing back ohallaron and not using him is a masterstroke it’s kept st Johnstone out the top six and he was only going to score goals for saints and help them take points from our other top six rivals.

    Genious stuff.

  4. It is all so hard to keep track of, but wasn’t Dave King deemed Not Fit and Proper to be on a football CLUB board and is in fact on the COMPANY board. Yet he is routinely described as Rangers Chairman. There isn’t a rule in existence that this mob don’t immediately think ‘how do we get round this one?’ It seems to be in their DNA.
    We await the slippery club / company skullduggery when the financial music stops.
    The SFA / SPFL should be doing something. Lol.

  5. Are there any supporters of the old Rangers out there, who walked away knowing in their hearts that their team had died? No matter how many season ticket holders there are at Ibrox stadium, they are kidding themselves on. They are living a lie. So sad.

  6. Yogithebear commented on an anti McCann crusade by JJ in this site. That is not the case.

    He has presented facts and insights which the British press dare not touch. His articles regarding the odious McCann’s have been brave and incredibly researched.

    I live in a farm outside Luz for quite a lot of the year when the weather is kind. I can assure you that no one here believes for a moment that this child was abducted. No one. No evidence. But evidence of a cover up.

    This young child was left alone in an apartment here in Luz. She was not supervised by a baby sitter nor a nanny. She was left alone whilst her parents were having fun in a nearby taverns. And she disappeared.

    Those are the simple facts. Kate and Gerry McCann are guilty of negligence and anyway one looks at it, they are GUILTY. Local police wanted them to be charged with negligence and the twins to be fostered out. Political intervention prevented that from happening.

    They are responsible for the ‘disappearance’ of their child. It’s as simple as that.

    This is not a crusade. This is a presentation of the facts. The McCanns are jolly fortunate not to be behind bars.

    1. Bang on The Mensch and it is also NOTHING to do with “opinion” Yogithebear – It is to do with FACTS and EVIDENCE which have been presented by JJ here on his site and also by plenty of other people such as Richard D Hall with 4 or 5 long documentaries etc exposing the McCann’s and if anyone still believes the McCanns version of events after all of the FACTS and EVIDENCE out there then I have a bridge to sell to you cheap and I will throw in Paisley Town Hall for free.

    2. I agree 100% with you, TM. One question has to be asked, however. Why did the McCanns receive such top-level advice? Some say it is because they were doctors and not poor or working class, but that doesn’t cut it. A surgeon and a GP, no matter how brilliant they might be, do not normally get this kind of assistance and advice. Four prime ministers have been involved for fuck’s sake! I suggest that paedophilia in high places might offer a clue. It also helps to explain the Dunblane shooting incident.

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